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Erie_Abreu_6358
Erie_Abreu_6358Lv45mth
2024-11-18 01:06

I didn’t say the beginning. I just fell in love with the story to me a kingdom building story are extremely rare and a good one at that but later in the story, he leaves the Crimson star tribe, and he becomes a personal power show which disappoints me, to be honest, I started reading the story because I had a kingdom title honestly, it’s hard for me to find any kingdom building story but this story has entertain me so yeah.

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Other Reviews
MK_Infinity
MK_InfinityLv14
Oakley_Tallent
Oakley_TallentLv15

hello everyone, just wanted to let you know my thoughts on this book so far ~100chs in. The author often forgets what he has said in past chapters. For example, saying everyone's strength is limited to level 1 no matter how strong they are, yet still compares strength saying someone is stronger as a level 6, when all their powers are supposed to be limited suggesting there is no limiting factor🤦‍♂️. The pronouns used make it difficult to know who is talking and what gender they are, because the wrong pronouns are constantly used. The names all seem to be non-gender-specific. I'm not sure what gender a lot of the characters are because of the pronouns issue, but also because some male/female names seem to be used for the wrong gender. The flow of conversations will sometimes leave you scratching your head wondering what just happened because the responses make no sense based on what happened before and then what they end up doing after. On a plus note, the spelling seems pretty accurate so far, no notable mentions. The author desperately needs to write up a prologue to explain about the tribal fire, totems, and everything related to that to make things clearer to readers. Right now it seems like anything goes for the author🤦‍♂️. Overall, the book needs heavy editing. The story is interesting, but very confusing to keep track of what is what and what is happening. Makes me wish I had the time it takes to be an editor because there are a lot of books on web novel that desperately need a good editor😅. I like this book, but it's not good enough to pay for unless the author is willing to pay a really good editor to help make the story flow better. What is there is good, but it's like a diamond in the rough needing some heavy polishing to really stand out. Have a good day everyone!

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