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OceanoAzul
OceanoAzulLv111yr
2024-05-02 01:04

uma boa historia espero que foque mais na area de negocios acho que será interresante ele criar uma grande empreso no brasil ja que aqui e um grande caos para empreender

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Replies4
MK0
MK0Author

essa vai ser a parte mais dificil. porra eu não quero estudar nossas leis trabalhistas

OceanoAzul
OceanoAzulLv11

Nem os advogados trabalhistas querem estudar kkkkkk

MK0:essa vai ser a parte mais dificil. porra eu não quero estudar nossas leis trabalhistas
one_piece_TV
one_piece_TVLv14

que dia vai ter capítulos

one_piece_TV
one_piece_TVLv14

quando vai ter mais capítulo

Other Reviews
Worldofimagination
WorldofimaginationLv12

Let's go. I don't know if the author has abandoned this, but I'll give my review anyway. As a good Brazilian, I really liked that the story is set here in Brazil, and the author spoke a lot of truths and described many things perfectly. But I need to say, brother, there are some things in the chapters that are unrealistic and don't make sense, and in the future, this might come back to bite you. First, the system: it's way too OP, and when I say too much, I mean really too much. First of all, letting the protagonist gain a power or knowledge every month is excessive. There will come a time when you won't have any more powers or knowledge to give him because you will have given everything. Imagine in 12 years, when the plot really begins, your MC will have 144 different powers. That's a lot, and the knowledge is even more powerful since he doesn't need to do anything to receive it. On this topic, another thing I didn't like was how easily the MC gets things. It's way too easy. He’s not struggling at all like a good Brazilian would. I’d prefer it to be a normal system where he actually has to train. We have capoeira that he could practice, but I mean really practice, without receiving it from his system. This will definitely make the MC lazy. And back to the system, there are so many things that I doubt you'll use half of them. Store? The MC will still be able to buy all kinds of things. You wrote in a chapter that there will be characters from other worlds. Another senseless thing, author. There are many interesting characters in DC, some of whom are even Brazilian (look them up). So I don't see the point in bringing characters from other worlds. Want beautiful women? Wonder Woman doesn't lose to anyone, author! My final assessment is this: the main villain in your fanfic is your system. Everything else is perfect.

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Daichi_TBR193 · Others
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