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ydoBoN
ydoBoNLv17mth
2024-09-01 04:01

Cane is overly 'Gary Stu,' resolving every problem with little to no consequences. The author also struggles with specific grammatical errors, such as repetitive phrasing within the same paragraph. Additionally, they have issues with punctuation, often misusing commas and periods, which leads to sentences that are too long. Besides that it's a solid story.

Hazbin Hotel: Story of Cain

OneMoreScore
4.5
91 Chs

Liked by 2 people

LIKE
Replies2
OneMoreScore
OneMoreScoreAuthor

Ok

7mth
1
ydoBoN
ydoBoNLv1

I’ll be completely honest, I just finished reading the last ten chapters, and you’ve completely changed my opinion. The plot and world-building have skyrocketed, and the character development and drama have surpassed anything seen before.

7mth
1
Other Reviews
Crytach
CrytachLv14

a bit confused ... isn't Cain Adams kid with eve? or did it change in the show? far as I know Cain killed his brother Abel and Adam chased him away after god cursed him.

1yr

Aady_Shrestha
Aady_ShresthaLv4

This fanfic all together isn’t bad. The writing quality is good and there are little to no grammatical mistakes, It updates very frequently like 1 chapter a day, and the world of Hazbin hotel just has so much potential to explode and expand. But where this fanfic falls of is in its story, the bits with Adam are very fun to read as we get to explore more of Heaven but the parts with Cain fall of flat. Cain is just not as interesting, he’s bland not because he has no character but because he has too much going on he is just really boring to read. This story should have focused on Adam and Cain equally. All in all it’s not a bad fanfic but it could definitely be better.

1yr
Gamer_Otaku448879
Gamer_Otaku448879Lv14

What if you made a fic about Adam in hazbin hotel about a guy becoming Adam with a system

9mth
DaoistUdrot0
DaoistUdrot0Lv15

10000000/10 a must read for any hazbin hotel/ helluva boss fan

1yr
maelvoid_2025
maelvoid_2025Lv4

Overall it is a great story with little to no grammatical mistakes. However, the pov of Cane is boring. He's too perfect with no actual flaws which hampers the story in the long run. It would have been much more interesting actual watching him climb the latter towards being an overlord while building his empire. Theirs also the relationship development area...it's kinda lacking especially when hes first introduced into the story. The jabs he thrown at lucifer were unnecessary and overplayed. In general he is a gary sue type character.... Though this is just my opinion after reading it.

10mth
DaoistX4em3e
DaoistX4em3eLv1

Güzel bir seri devamı gelsin burdan sonrası anlamsız kelimeler ,................................................... ve bu şekilde 10 bölümden oluşan bir iki gün önce eklendi ve bu şekilde 10 bölümden oluşan bir iki gün önce eklendi ve bu şekilde 10 bölümden oluşan bir iki gün önce eklendi ve bu şekilde 10 bölümden oluşan bir iki gün önce eklendi ve bu 6

1yr
CodexZero
CodexZeroLv4

Aye a Hazbin Hotel/Heluva boss fic, it is really rare to see. Hope you continue to update this, the fic itself is pretty good, but I noticed right off the bat that there are some spelling mistake, nothing too serious though

1yr
Demons_Ki
Demons_KiLv1

10/10 so I'm looking forward to more. [img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]

1yr
Kenk98928
Kenk98928Lv4

Had singing along with Cain on that one.

7mth
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