My thoughts for getting better is to practice speaking what you write. You don't need to simplify. Just write, read it through by mouth and then adjust to your liking.
GrandCaster:So my grammar is alrighr, but my writing style is over explanatory. Aight imma try to simplify it
You will improve man and there is already a similar story like this, you should go check it out, if you havenāt already. although I havenāt read your story yet but I will when there are more chapters. Good luck!
GrandCaster:is my grammar that bad fk hahaha šš
The best way to describe your grammar is over explaining almost everything. You explain parts that aren't important. Here's an example: Jin-woo looked at the sun and he breathe heavily. What I would write: Jin-woo looked over his shoulder to the sky and took in a deep breath for control. The first example is explaining a scene in an instant, but you exaggarete that one topic over a few sentences. The second is a smoother experience to make readers imagine the moment but does not over focus.
GrandCaster:is my grammar that bad fk hahaha šš
TOFIE:The best way to describe your grammar is over explaining almost everything. You explain parts that aren't important. Here's an example: Jin-woo looked at the sun and he breathe heavily. What I would write: Jin-woo looked over his shoulder to the sky and took in a deep breath for control. The first example is explaining a scene in an instant, but you exaggarete that one topic over a few sentences. The second is a smoother experience to make readers imagine the moment but does not over focus.