Its actually a really good novel with a grammar that can be considered as masterclass in webnovel, so far I'm liking the mc's personality though you also need to mention his motivation, story development is going good but I'm also hoping for a time skip in near chapters, and also you should focus some more on mc's power development a little more as right now his still very weak, the love interest is also going good as you're taking you're time so it wont be forced and well they are still young anyway, and I'm also hoping you wont mess up the fanfic by doing one of the fanfic taboo's such as NTR or making mc subservient to someone, like him joining rias's peerage, unlike some dxd fanfic i hope you don't do that just for the mc to join the rating game against riser as you can just eliminate him outside of rating games, and when you do go to other worlds and compare the power level i hope you don't mess it up like many other fanfics as that just makes readers annoyed, you can ask your readers when comparing if you aren't sure and don't follow battle wiki as that's just messed up from what I think, the only issue so far in this fanfic is the update stability, if you update so late readers might just forget about it and it will become one of hundred books in library, forgotten, but other than that its a good work so keep it up author [img=recommend]
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tnx for your review. Even I want to just skip to his teenage years and get started with canon. But there are some things he needs to do in his childhood. Like making important connections, establishing his organization, and preventing some tragedies. There will be some gradual and smaller-scale time skips. I don't want to make him invincible so soon. If an MC can do anything and everything right from the beginning, then the story would be less fun to read and write(for me). I will make him insanely strong, but gradually. He will work to get there. I'm working on it in my latest chapters which are still in draft. He's only been in that world for like half a year and is already Mid Class(in Patreon)in power. I think that's already very fast. Plz, don't compare that to the pervert. Even if he has a broken system, I want him to go slowly. I have already made him unkillable in DxD. Even Lucifer won't be able to kill him. Maybe some conceptual and spiritual power can kill him right now. He won't be joining any peerages. I want to teach Rias what will happen when she's so... lazy. As for the NTR part, I don't break up a fully happy marriage. [Spoiler- Grayfia is single and Sirzechs is happily married, at least in my story😁]
Yes that's good, i also don't want you to skip all the way to teenage years, just some small time skips like a year or two and yes him being mid class at that age is good as being higher will be forced and eventually have to be nerfed so its actually good, and good going with grafiya my friend[img=recommend] as she is one of the top waifus in dxd but can you please do something about her hair? as instead of being dull gray and short it will be soooo much better if its silver and long, like you can make it so mc gives her something like a bloodline or similar things that will not only make her strong but will also make her more beautiful
You can also make it pure white with lighter skin color like this
the only grammar mistake is his name Kouske, that doesnt exist, it instead should be spelled Kousuke.
There is literally no such thing as grammatical mistakes for names. At least in my country, it's common for names to have various spellings even if they sound the same. For example, my real name (first name) has two different spellings, and my surname has three. It's important to respect these variations.
And initially I actually wanted to use Kousuke as the spelling. But I made a mistake and wrote it wrong on the first chapter. Since then I have been just rolling with it.
