webnovel
Dao_8teh
Dao_8tehLv41yr
2023-08-27 15:53

So far, so good! The story so far is not too shabby. Maybe elaborate more on daily life or slice of life elements, but also add little more worldbuilding and background. Overall I genuinely like it. Keep going and continue the work, you’re doing great!👍👍😀😀😄

Son of Franklin

HydroG3
4.7
32 Chs

Liked by 4 people

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Replies4
HydroG3
HydroG3Author

What red commendations do you have for slice of life additions. I’m always open to improvements

1yr
1
Dao_8teh
Dao_8tehLv4

“The Rebellion Burns Bright” by Okmangeez. Very similar premise to your novel, In my opinion does very well in showcasing albeit a bit too idealistic. “Tyranny of Steel” by Zentmeister, Great in Worldbuilding, Lore, and Realistic knowledge of various things. Although it was great read, I have some criticism towards that novel. Any books by SorryImJustDiamond, Great at characterization and showing various aspects of Knowledge from Modern day. At times a bit unrealistic. There is some web fictions I want to mention like any books by rub37 and Sarthak in alternatehistory, though you may need an account to access. For now that is all the recommendations.

HydroG3:What red commendations do you have for slice of life additions. I’m always open to improvements
1yr
1
HydroG3
HydroG3Author

Thanks for the recommendations. I don't plan on the MC being some guy who can change the entire culture of the USA overnight without much effort or push back. The plan is for a methodical build up of economic strength to make social change through monetary incentives. I love tyranny of steel, but I feel like it progressed to rapidly sometimes so progression through the tech tree will be paced down a bit.

Dao_8teh:“The Rebellion Burns Bright” by Okmangeez. Very similar premise to your novel, In my opinion does very well in showcasing albeit a bit too idealistic. “Tyranny of Steel” by Zentmeister, Great in Worldbuilding, Lore, and Realistic knowledge of various things. Although it was great read, I have some criticism towards that novel. Any books by SorryImJustDiamond, Great at characterization and showing various aspects of Knowledge from Modern day. At times a bit unrealistic. There is some web fictions I want to mention like any books by rub37 and Sarthak in alternatehistory, though you may need an account to access. For now that is all the recommendations.
1yr
Dao_8teh
Dao_8tehLv4

That is one of my criticisms, other the unnecessary genocides of other ethnic groups.

HydroG3:Thanks for the recommendations. I don't plan on the MC being some guy who can change the entire culture of the USA overnight without much effort or push back. The plan is for a methodical build up of economic strength to make social change through monetary incentives. I love tyranny of steel, but I feel like it progressed to rapidly sometimes so progression through the tech tree will be paced down a bit.
1yr
1
Other Reviews
JussMonty
JussMontyLv14

The writing quality is great, nothing a newbie like me can provide an opinion for. I know you said you'll do weekly updates and I'm really exited to see what happens next. The story is developing nicely, I like how you handled the father situation. It added an extra layer to the characters that I really enjoyed. I hope you can do more with Eli, his relationship with John hasn't been explored much now that they are teenagers. I don't remember if you had an pictures for the characters, but the cover art is really cool and I'm assuming that's the main character. The world background is done really well, I personally do not like to research much when writing a story as I feel like that ruins the fun for me a little bit. But I can appreciate it when you can tell that an author knows what they are talking about. Especially with the complicated history of America's independence.

1yr

No_Name_8410
No_Name_8410Lv4

there is only one problem with this story there isn't enough

1yr
mrwolf_hdmi
mrwolf_hdmiLv4

This novel is looking promising. MC is not an a...hole with supper ego or OP and shows emotions beside happiness.Please, if it is possible, and not too time-consuming. Add some pictures as a comment.

1yr
gregory_echavarria
gregory_echavarriaLv4

Great book author at first I didn’t think it would be this good I the way the character interact with each other. Also the unique business ideas that you come up with

1yr
greatcheesemaster
greatcheesemasterLv4

Love the story very interesting concept wish you all the luck in keeping the quality of the novel consistent

1yr
slimy_Boi
slimy_BoiLv4

this is really good but sometimes there's ome or two cringe worthy moments... but don't be discouraged this novel has great potential

1yr
Wilder6
Wilder6Lv15

Great story, hope you keep it going for many many more chapters!

1yr
danieldougles
danieldouglesLv1

I think that's a great original story. It might be a good idea to create a compromise, between the colonies and England, similar to how Ireland got its independance. Some historians say the lack of communication let to the war, but with a moderate negotiator such as John, they might come to an agreement.

1yr
Blutmond
BlutmondLv3

Good

1yr
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