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intothedarkabyss
intothedarkabyssLv21yr
2023-10-02 12:08

My reading experience may be different, super different - but it's important to note that I don't speak for someone else's experience. In addition to the feedback I provided in my Google Document and in-line comments, I'd like to share some additional thoughts here. I admire the author's willingness to learn and their openness to criticism. Yep, they are keen and responsive. The story itself holds a lot of potential. In my own perspective, I believe it could be further enhanced with a more developed and concise story structure. Unpopular opinion, a shorter prelude would be more effective. However, it's super important to acknowledge that creative direction is ultimately the author's right. Grammar-wise, I can see that the author is making a genuine effort, and I'm super happy to observe improvements with each chapter. What's needed now is to focus on the narrative with emotional depth, ensure a proper sentence structure, and seamlessly connect thoughts. Sadly, I had to drop this story - okay, this isn't bad. But hear me out first. I just found it increasingly difficult to maintain interest due to the prolonged drama. However, this is purely a reflection of my personal reading experience. Nevertheless, it was still a nice reading journey.

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ToufiqUlAlam
ToufiqUlAlamAuthor

Your review gave me a new idea...i will work on it first...then let you know about the development - the rough draft... Will notify you after it's done. Is that okay?

intothedarkabyss
intothedarkabyssLv2

Sure, just let me know. And you're amazing! Keep up!!

ToufiqUlAlam:Your review gave me a new idea...i will work on it first...then let you know about the development - the rough draft... Will notify you after it's done. Is that okay?
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