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Re_shinLv32yr
2023-01-17 19:58

This is an interesting thing. It's like a top version of H*ntai. There's no plot. It is a wish fulfillment novel. I wonder how far it will go. Still, it's a bit boring as it has a straight logic. It could be better. His actions would have been more satisfying if he had improved the characters and their backstory.

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Alex_morgAuthor

Any suggestion? I will implement them in the future story.

Re_shinLv3

Your story is good but lacks depth. The man goes to a random place and satisfies himself. For example, the situation with his boss was satisfactory. In the background, his boss treated him badly. Doing so with her boss was both revenge and a fantasy come true. But the other characters have no depth at all. I don't know what path you have for this novel. I have read 26 chapters. This novel leaves nothing to my imagination. It is not my intention to discourage you, but the course of this novel is haphazard. It's nice that Lucas can make every wish come true. But not getting any reaction or emotion from the women he did is the same as doing it with a puppet. For example, although what he did to his boss was satisfying, it did not cause any emotion in the woman. Perceiving it as something normal isn't fun at all. You could have given the background to the characters and enhanced them. For example, as a man whom he hates does his wife in front of the man. As I said, this novel has a nice concept, but it doesn't have a good plot.

Alex_morg:Any suggestion? I will implement them in the future story.
Nightmare_MonarchLv14

Who is that character on that pic? Source please?

Re_shin:Your story is good but lacks depth. The man goes to a random place and satisfies himself. For example, the situation with his boss was satisfactory. In the background, his boss treated him badly. Doing so with her boss was both revenge and a fantasy come true. But the other characters have no depth at all. I don't know what path you have for this novel. I have read 26 chapters. This novel leaves nothing to my imagination. It is not my intention to discourage you, but the course of this novel is haphazard. It's nice that Lucas can make every wish come true. But not getting any reaction or emotion from the women he did is the same as doing it with a puppet. For example, although what he did to his boss was satisfying, it did not cause any emotion in the woman. Perceiving it as something normal isn't fun at all. You could have given the background to the characters and enhanced them. For example, as a man whom he hates does his wife in front of the man. As I said, this novel has a nice concept, but it doesn't have a good plot.
Re_shinLv3

Player Who Returned 10,000 Years Later

Nightmare_Monarch:Who is that character on that pic? Source please?
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