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Livylivalive
LivylivaliveLv112yr
2022-12-26 00:04

Overall and good points: So far, it is the typical transmigration story with a system. It is however, not a revenge story and the aim for now is to survive. The background setting is quite interesting family wise. On top of that, the content is quite easy to comprehend. Nevertheless, what makes this story interesting is unique and unexpected antagonists and plot changes- the silver lining of this book. The thing about this book that I really appreciate is the presence of intrigue and calculations on what could have happened and why things happen. A sort of human behavior prediction. Cons: It is hard to call the style as outstanding, not to mention triggering curiosity is rather hard in beginning chapters. Character could be more developed, there is a lot of wasted potential, especially with what happened to bell, whilst the unexpectedness is quite entertaining, I see an ark wasted. Also, the dialogues make it hard to immerse fully as they sound as though taken from a modern setting and a bit bland or too explanatory. Another thing that turned me off, was how easy the character gained points. There should be a more gripping, heart throbbing journey. Maybe because it’s the beginning, I can’t seem to get excited. Additionally, other than the mc journey being too easy is the lack of any sort of moral compass. I can’t see the difference between the mc and scum. Adding this after reading chapter 8, but I really cannot see cliff hangers and conflicts get resolved too easily. It’s like the ark ended before it began. Advice : Perhaps, add more flavor to the character such as stoic, lively, cold, passionate, devious, scheming etc. i know it is a character setting on its own but the mc seems bland. And add more conjunctions and sentence structure variation so the readers doesn’t get bored. Stop wasting arks and plot points. Also, this one is probably me, but I am really tired of demon gods.

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Choka
ChokaAuthor

I appreciate your long review, but you ads indeed correct about the character at the beginning as I it was my first days of writing and I didn't know how to display his personality clearly. About the easy grinding, you are wrong cause it's 76 chapters in right now and the mc didn't even reach tier 1 so yeah haha. About the ark you are as well wrong, the first Ark didn't even end yet. The quality isn't so good at first I understand, but I believe that I'm trying to make it look better as I improve the more I'm writing. Enjoy the future chapters if you gonna keep reading and thank you again for the review 😊.

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