For the most part its typical returner vrmmo fair, but the Author makes 2 very bold decisions that stand out, however, they also don’t seem to have thought through the consequences. 1) The NPCs are near lifeless automatons running a script and listening to key words, with occasional cutscenes. The author describes NPC interactions and story elements as boring to even the mc so what does it mean for anyone to play this game, why are they doing it at all, it can't be just combat gameplay right? Leads to point 2. 2) The author casually tosses out an absolute bombshell that time moves 48x faster in the game. This has insane consequences: the mc returned after 12 years means he is nearly 500 years old. With the game a person with a lifespan of 100 years could live closer to 4800 years! This is also where most of the logic of the story breaks down. Why did the company make a game when they invented the fountain of eternal life? Why would a company make a game when they made the ultimate productivity machine? How are relationships affected when a weekend apart is over 2 months of separation (16 hours a day gaming, 2 days becomes 64)? How is work affected? On Mondays I forget what I was working when leaving on Friday, just 48 hour gap imagine a 64 days. Also in game timing has numerous errors because author does not consistently consider the 48x speed when narrative requires cooldowns for abilities or delays in quests, or when MC talks about how much time has elapsed. Why does the MC act like a 20 year old when he is the oldest human on the planet after his return? Why is he attracted to anyone not mentally in their hundreds, or getting flustered by anything he should have seen it all and become a curmudgeonly person right? Other points of interest for me: - So far the MC is a near pure mage (yay!), unfortunately there are hints of him becoming a boring typical magic swordsman considering his last life was a sword class and him wielding a staff covered in fire occasionally. - Shadow powers are cool -He knows way too much about the game, from his perspective his early unlocks should be things he heard in rumours 500 years ago not something he knows in detail and can just follow the steps. He should be able to sniff out points of interest not know exactly where they are and every intimate detail. - The game presents all the stats and abilities of the enemies; this is bad for both the game and the narrative. Why not make the combat more exciting for both the characters and readers if abilities need to be guessed at like in a real fight. Each fight could be far far more interesting. In conclusion if you have read a returner VRMMO you have probably know what to expect, but the flavor of a shadow mage who at least for now isnt a lame magic swordsman has me liking the brew. The author has 2 bold choices that I think they could lean into to really spice up what makes this story more unique than a typical entry in the genre.
Liked by 52 people
LIKE
Hello, This is me, the pizza delivery guy... Since your review was more like a book on its own I decided to read it. 1) I'll try to make NPCs more lively, because even I was unsatisfied by how poorly they were written. 2) I've already seen some of your comments throughout the book and will take care of this error. I kind of made the time adjustments similar to the Minecraft's which was not the wisest choice. All in all I hate you, because you correct my mistakes and since my ego is bigger than my brain I do not appreciate wise behavior around these parts. Peace out! ~ Pizza Delivery Guy
I want to say I think your instincts are initially correct, they are not mistakes! Its actually very interesting idea for npcs to be lifeless, and for the outrageous time speed and how these elements have like 100th order consequences. Those are super unique aspects to play with in a very busy genre I think you should lean into what makes your story different new and fun.
Gurdon:Hello, This is me, the pizza delivery guy... Since your review was more like a book on its own I decided to read it. 1) I'll try to make NPCs more lively, because even I was unsatisfied by how poorly they were written. 2) I've already seen some of your comments throughout the book and will take care of this error. I kind of made the time adjustments similar to the Minecraft's which was not the wisest choice. All in all I hate you, because you correct my mistakes and since my ego is bigger than my brain I do not appreciate wise behavior around these parts. Peace out! ~ Pizza Delivery Guy
Since I brought your mood down I want to offer ideas of why these “issues” have me so excited for the story!! 1) Since the npcs start lifeless and the timescale is so extreme what if the npcs slowly develop into full sentience? What does it look like for someone to log back in after a few days absence where months have gone by in game and the npc they were talking with is smarter than when they left? Do they eventually rebel? Do the integrate? Do they try fooling the humans? Since mc is from the future is he opposed to any of these changes or support them? 2) if npcs remain lifeless and the timescale remains so extreme do players start stepping up becoming the main creators of narritive/content? They are going to love there for 1000s of years of course it matter more than their “real lives”! Humans start building cities and empires? 3) the company behind all this what is their goal? Do they want to enslave huamnity? Offer eternal life? The foutain of youth? Does the creator have a dying kid or spouse they want to extend their life? 4) how are kids affected? A 5 year old who spends 8 hours in game for a year is now a 6 year old body while being a 21 year old mentally! There are endless interesting conseqences!
Gurdon:Hello, This is me, the pizza delivery guy... Since your review was more like a book on its own I decided to read it. 1) I'll try to make NPCs more lively, because even I was unsatisfied by how poorly they were written. 2) I've already seen some of your comments throughout the book and will take care of this error. I kind of made the time adjustments similar to the Minecraft's which was not the wisest choice. All in all I hate you, because you correct my mistakes and since my ego is bigger than my brain I do not appreciate wise behavior around these parts. Peace out! ~ Pizza Delivery Guy
I'm kind of interested in all ideas, but I think I'll slightly modify the time speed game in game, because as you noticed its getting hard to follow for me as well. ~ The Outrageous Avocado ~
R4GE:Since I brought your mood down I want to offer ideas of why these “issues” have me so excited for the story!! 1) Since the npcs start lifeless and the timescale is so extreme what if the npcs slowly develop into full sentience? What does it look like for someone to log back in after a few days absence where months have gone by in game and the npc they were talking with is smarter than when they left? Do they eventually rebel? Do the integrate? Do they try fooling the humans? Since mc is from the future is he opposed to any of these changes or support them? 2) if npcs remain lifeless and the timescale remains so extreme do players start stepping up becoming the main creators of narritive/content? They are going to love there for 1000s of years of course it matter more than their “real lives”! Humans start building cities and empires? 3) the company behind all this what is their goal? Do they want to enslave huamnity? Offer eternal life? The foutain of youth? Does the creator have a dying kid or spouse they want to extend their life? 4) how are kids affected? A 5 year old who spends 8 hours in game for a year is now a 6 year old body while being a 21 year old mentally! There are endless interesting conseqences!image
Follow up update, around chap 100 author did indeed pull the trigger on a game update reducing the game time to near 1:1. It does fix the character actions ie now hes more loke 30 instead of 500 he still acts far too young for a 30 year old but far better than a 500 year old so its a decent solution. I am disappinted they abandoned sucha bold and cool concept and totally unique for the genre, all the insane societal consequences would be so exciting, but I understand author was struggling with it.
romance? Harém?
No harem yet nor signs of it so far. There is hints of romance with a single character.
GreatDaoofspace:romance? Harém?
harem?
Gurdon:I'm kind of interested in all ideas, but I think I'll slightly modify the time speed game in game, because as you noticed its getting hard to follow for me as well. ~ The Outrageous Avocado ~
Author San i am just waiting for your confirmation if it's harem or not and many more reader's are waiting for the same so please confirm so we can read the book the confirmation will only do you good and no harm
Gurdon:I'm kind of interested in all ideas, but I think I'll slightly modify the time speed game in game, because as you noticed its getting hard to follow for me as well. ~ The Outrageous Avocado ~
it is not harem
its_L:Author San i am just waiting for your confirmation if it's harem or not and many more reader's are waiting for the same so please confirm so we can read the book the confirmation will only do you good and no harm
nope
RainbowBeheader:harem?
good
Gurdon:nope
this is a very constructive review well I will read the novel anyway. if the mc turn in a melee hybrid then I just drop it i'm fan of pure mages
Author I like the original ideas that you had and would like to flesh out a novel that I’m currently working on with the two mentioned above by the original review creator such as Npcs gaining intelligence over time but in my case it will be that since the time difference will be so outrageousous I’m going to introduce the main npcs as characters that started out their life young and gained experience over time would you mind if I used those ideas if you do I wouldn’t mind not using them
Gurdon:nope
Go ahead, I don't mind you using those ideas. If anything I encourage you to do that. Good luck!
FallenAzazel:Author I like the original ideas that you had and would like to flesh out a novel that I’m currently working on with the two mentioned above by the original review creator such as Npcs gaining intelligence over time but in my case it will be that since the time difference will be so outrageousous I’m going to introduce the main npcs as characters that started out their life young and gained experience over time would you mind if I used those ideas if you do I wouldn’t mind not using them
I think I've read a novel that has this background as the npcs become more and more intelligent and come to life and eventually integrate humans into their society through missions and rewards and manage to control a large number of players.
R4GE:Follow up update, around chap 100 author did indeed pull the trigger on a game update reducing the game time to near 1:1. It does fix the character actions ie now hes more loke 30 instead of 500 he still acts far too young for a 30 year old but far better than a 500 year old so its a decent solution. I am disappinted they abandoned sucha bold and cool concept and totally unique for the genre, all the insane societal consequences would be so exciting, but I understand author was struggling with it.
I think it's Mages are too OP, if not, correct me, I don't even remember the name of the work.
Oops i missed the original comment you made, in mages are too OP they dont become sentient they always were, they are the sleeping conciousness of real people from the real version of the game world, Its a pretty silly ending to a good book that just went off the rails like seul station necromancer, just god awful endings that come out of no where.
yug_moto:I think it's Mages are too OP, if not, correct me, I don't even remember the name of the work.
It's been a long time since I read it, as far as I followed the story it was good but there were 2 characters that kept blocking the mc, then I got frustrated.
R4GE:Oops i missed the original comment you made, in mages are too OP they dont become sentient they always were, they are the sleeping conciousness of real people from the real version of the game world, Its a pretty silly ending to a good book that just went off the rails like seul station necromancer, just god awful endings that come out of no where.
wait! faster? not slower? even if you played 12 years straight, you'd only experience 2 months in the game.
