This is the first review I write and this is also the first review you are going to get but I will not mince my words. Writing Quality: The writing quality isn't bad but I do not understand AT ALL why the author puts commas at the end of each dialogue. Moreover, in chapter 4, the author put an additional note (AD) at the end of the chapter mentioning a notation that is relevant for comprehension of the chapter, that's illogic. I will also add that you won't found high IQ decisions as mentioned in the tags because, again, in chapter 4, we learn that he cannot understand his new family but yet know his sister's name and the fact that he has 2 other brothers ( The author really need to read what he wrote before publishing it, he will avoid disappointment from readers like myself ). Moreover, your notes are breaking immersion, use them carefully( addressing the author ). Stability of Updates: I don't care but judging by the length of each chapter, I'll assume that the story is updated frequently, so this is good for the audience. Story Development: Honestly, the pace is too fast in the prologue but after that it slows a bit so I won't say more. Character Design: I don't think the author cared enough about his/her characters because, as I said earlier, the pace in the prologue is too fast creating a replaceable protagonist as well as forgettable minor characters like Randy. This guy literally dies few paragraphs after introducing it. It isn't bad but you can find better in terms of character design. World Background: The magic system is quite usual but yet detailed so there is nothing to complain about. However, I think that the first chapter lack environmental detail like what kind of world the boy is living in for example. Note to Author: Your work isn't bad but you seriously need to master some writing skills and actually read what you wrote to get a global idea of the final work. I recommend to you this youtube channel where you can found everything you need to work on to improve yourself : Diane Callahan. To conclude, I won't add this novel to my library because I didn't get attached the protagonist.
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About the dialogues having commas at the end... It isn't that rare to see commas at the end of dialogues. When you add a dialogue tag (he jumped, he cried, he said, etc) you are to use a comma; or if it fits, a question mark or and exclamation mark will do as well.
I checked just to be sure and it appears that you are right but as a French person, I just don't understand the logic. However, I appreciate your reply because I will use it for future works so thanks.
dottore:About the dialogues having commas at the end... It isn't that rare to see commas at the end of dialogues. When you add a dialogue tag (he jumped, he cried, he said, etc) you are to use a comma; or if it fits, a question mark or and exclamation mark will do as well.
Ah, I see. I suppose it's because the dialogue tag itself is considered as part of the sentence along with the dialogue.
KuMiShi:I checked just to be sure and it appears that you are right but as a French person, I just don't understand the logic. However, I appreciate your reply because I will use it for future works so thanks.
