Review Detail of 123removed in The Energy System

I really like it! The story is giving me hitchhiker of the galaxy vibes a bit, though that may just be because I'm not very familiar with the concept. I like that it's fast paced, and I also like that you treat everything as 'normal', even though it's fantasy (as opposed to feeling the need to explain every little detail). As for tips, I have only two. Firstly, mind your verb tenses. You tend to switch between past and present tense at times. And secondly, try to limit the descriptive bits a little. You're great at those (and I love your vocabulary), but personally I'd switch a bit more between description and action, if that makes sense. 😁