This is one LONG chapter! The script type dialogues need a change! And you should definitely split this chapter. Webnovel readers enjoy chapters that are 1000-2000 words long, and anything beyond that is too long for their taste. I'm intrigued by the plot and characters so far, and you're vivid descriptions of the scene are entertaining. You're word choice is amazing and got me hooked! Hopefully, you fix those issues, because this novel has A LOT of potential!
Ntinu_Mpindi
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