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Asriel_IsDreemurr
Asriel_IsDreemurrLv43yr
2021-05-29 18:02

Writing quality good. Updating good. Story development cookies. Character design Pizza. World back ground fanfic. Now I have to fill uh 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍊🍏🍎🍎🍏🥭🍐🍒🍅🥑🥥🥔🌽🥕🥜🥜🥬🍄🥦🌰🥨🥐🥯🥞🥩🧀🍗🍗🧀🍟🥓🍔🍕🌭🥪🌮🌯🥙🥚🍳🥘🍲🥣🥗🍿🧂🥫🍱🍘🍙🍚🍛🍜🍝🍠🍢🍣🍤🍥🥮🍡🥟🥠🥡🍦🍧🍨🍩🍪🎂🍰🧁🥧🍫🍬🍭🍮🍯🍼🥛☕🍵🍶🍾🍷🍸🍹🍺🍻🥂🥃🥤🥢🍽🍴🥄🔪🏺

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ASHARA
ASHARAAuthor

Thanks for the review.

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UndeadBeing
UndeadBeingLv12

Well the main reason I dislike this is the mc’s an idiot. I like the author, I like everything besides the mc. Now allow me to explain why, Mc folds under “pressure” Anything to do with his brother and he can’t keep his mouth shut, he was said to be someone who had to survive by himself but he can’t keep his mouth shut, his intellect is questionable, he has mood/personality swings from thinking he won’t miss his parents to crying when she dies, he keeps 0 secrets from his brother who by all purposes should leave him, he’s the typical “acts cold towards his enemies and exceptionally nice to his friends” I know the typical excuse “only they’re gonna know” but that’s a whole lot of plot armor, no amount of slip up can warrant him to not only tell he’s from a different world but also tell everything that happened including his death, the goddess, his reincarnation, I’m assuming the system (of which he uses his inventory for everyone to see, literally in battle pulls glass shards out of his inventory, but magically only the demon saw it) tells him all of that which he could easily just answer the question with saying he has good memory :/ the story was ok except that he’s tryimg to follow the story, For a person’s first novel they should imo should make their own story. Story is pretty boring and monotonous, there’s not much progress and the starting chapters amonth take a while for progress and also after a time skip add tons of things without an explaination. I don’t recommend reading this. Overall 3.2 ⭐️

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