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_Rain
_RainLv113yr
2021-06-29 01:41

This novel is goood and the storyline is unique. Writing quality is good but I would like to suggest to change the narration a little. Like when you use the colons, it kind of goes fast pace while reading, in my mind making it difficult to catch onto the emotions you want the reader to feel. It also distracts the readers from reading the story. It's always better to show than tell the emotions. Other than that, the book has potential. Good work, Author!

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