Review Detail of ForgottenHope in Luck is a Charm
Review detail
I don't want to bash you in, like the other guy did on his review. i know this is your first novel and your still improving but am gonna have to drop. Your mc is just way to annoying, i really did try and read more, but at this point am just skimming through chapters. (Mc problems) 1: The fact the he actually paid for the wand that was disposable was just bad, he could have still made excuses or try to haggle over the wand, you think he would learn a thing or two over haggling because he grew in that type of environment, but no, He didn't. 2: Some what the same problem, butcher guy was to ripping him off but as soon as he thought that the butcher guy was helping him with the girl, he dropped everything thing because he thought he was a "man of culture" for helping him with the girl. 3: MOST ANNOYING PROBLEM OF THEM ALL! Annoying simp mc, Jesus Christ the first pretty girl that he meets he instantly goes monke mode for her, I can't imagine what would happen when he meets someone like a Princess or a Queen, that look more beautiful than her or some other higher being that's more beautiful.
Luck is a Charm
Idczhen
Liked by 27 people
LIKEReplies4
Hmm, your bashing is logical and reasonable so I appreciate your review. 1. Indeed, haggling would be fine but since he was in confusion at that time and have Sense to detect a person's temperature to detect if lying, he didn't overthink that. 2. Because you have reviewed before re-reading my just edited chapter 1 to have it improve, I understand your point. What I'm trying to say is that the MC has zero knowledge of romantic relationship and it's his first time. He just a lonely man that wants to cuddle and be lovey dovey with a beauty. 3. Can't really reason with my MC being simp as I simply respect a female and not try to have them as Background character or wallpaper. I want to write in my novel that female can also be strong by themselves. Overall, I'm thankful for this review and would try to fix the mistake if it doesn't ruin the whole flow of the story.
Well i like your idea but the presentation is not really that good. Which is understandable because it is your first novel after all. Am just gonna come back until his character gets better or until there's more chapters.
Idczhen:Hmm, your bashing is logical and reasonable so I appreciate your review. 1. Indeed, haggling would be fine but since he was in confusion at that time and have Sense to detect a person's temperature to detect if lying, he didn't overthink that. 2. Because you have reviewed before re-reading my just edited chapter 1 to have it improve, I understand your point. What I'm trying to say is that the MC has zero knowledge of romantic relationship and it's his first time. He just a lonely man that wants to cuddle and be lovey dovey with a beauty. 3. Can't really reason with my MC being simp as I simply respect a female and not try to have them as Background character or wallpaper. I want to write in my novel that female can also be strong by themselves. Overall, I'm thankful for this review and would try to fix the mistake if it doesn't ruin the whole flow of the story.
Well, I'm glad you gave me a chance to begin with. This is indeed my first novel so to get pass my first few chapters is already an achievement in my book. I have re-edit my chapter 1 and chapter 2 so if you ever feel like giving my novel a try, please read those chapter first.
ForgottenHope:Well i like your idea but the presentation is not really that good. Which is understandable because it is your first novel after all. Am just gonna come back until his character gets better or until there's more chapters.
