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ryanryan
ryanryanLv143yr
2021-01-11 06:06

Really good. Has a lot of potential.

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Other Reviews
RodolfoMaou
RodolfoMaouLv13

The fanfic offers a refreshing start with its descriptive writing, which is both easy to read and infused with a unique personality. The narrative quickly distinguishes itself from most others in the genre, drawing readers in with its vivid imagery and engaging prose. The inclusion of a "System" is handled with a delicate touch, providing a numerical gauge of the main character's strength without overwhelming the story. This lightweight approach keeps the focus on the character's journey rather than getting bogged down in mechanics. The initial arc is nothing short of captivating. It showcases the main character's tenacity and strategic thinking as he navigates the challenges of being a low-ranked Genin. This period of intense effort and risk-taking lays a solid foundation for his growth, making his subsequent rise in power both believable and rewarding. The second arc serves as a powerful motivator, setting the stage for even greater achievements in the third arc. However, the story's momentum falters dramatically during the Chunin Exams. This arc, which dominates nearly half of the narrative, undermines the main character's likability, dilutes the side characters' development, and disrupts the pacing. Initially, the main character's personality is a highlight of the story. His modest arrogance and relentless work ethic make him relatable and compelling. The mantra of "grind" becomes a defining trait, adding depth to both the character and the plot. Yet, as he gains more power, his arrogance spirals out of control, and his condescension towards others becomes grating. The anticipated humbling moment, where his flaws are addressed and his character matures, never arrives. Instead, he remains insufferably arrogant despite his relatively modest achievements on a grand scale. The side-cast is introduced with commendable depth and originality, deviating from typical fanfic portrayals without straying out of character. This well-rounded characterization, coupled with sharp dialogue, enriches the interactions between the main character and others. These interactions feel genuine, giving the impression that the side characters have lives and motivations of their own. Sadly, the Chunin Exams reduce these vibrant characters to mere spectators, stripping away their earlier complexity and relegating them to passive roles. The battles are another early strength of the story. They are fluid, well-structured, and showcase creative uses of jutsu, particularly the main character's signature techniques. However, the Chunin Exams mark a turning point where the main character's fights become predictably one-sided and devoid of tension. His overpowered nature, coupled with narrative constraints that prevent him from acting out fully, leads to a series of monotonous and uninspiring conflicts. A significant downside, present from the beginning but worsening over time, is the main character's interactions with female characters. His pervasive flirting and vulgar descriptions of their bodies quickly become tiresome. This behavior escalates into outright sexual harassment, eroding the personalities of the women in the story. Additionally, his antagonism towards every male character further detracts from his supposed hard-working mentality, making him appear more like a lust-driven predator than a dedicated ninja. This flaw, like his arrogance, is never resolved. Overall, the fanfic starts strong with a well-thought-out plot and engaging characters, but it takes an abysmal dive during the Chunin Exams arc. This pivotal section of the story introduces a host of flaws that gradually erode its initial charm, leaving an empty husk of what once held great promise. The best approach to reading this is to enjoy it up to the beginning of the Chunin Exam Arc and then imagine it concludes there. It's a disappointing turn of events, as the author initially displayed a rare talent for fanfic writing, only to let it be marred by poor execution in later chapters.

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