Review Detail of WidestGrin in My Time System

The author doesn't seem like English is his or her strongest language but it is a good attempt at writing for someone not well versed in the language. The story would do better as a comic where you see it visually and interruptions by the author within the story is more acceptable. I suggest the author to read simple English fairytales by Enid Blyton or Aesops fables to get a better understanding of writing fluently. I myself started writing after reading books by British and American authors. :) Good job, Author-tan, don't ever stop learning and creating!