Review Detail of yokedjaguar in Sors Mea Online (SMO) [Rough Version]
Review detail
Sorry but I hate the bully cliche, to be honest it's not even an cliche it's just disgustingly overused, the chapters way too short, mc is kinda annoying, you also have way too many info chapters put it in one or 2 chapters and be done with it, and when you write about vr stories its meant to about about the vr not so much of the real world sh*t, don't get me wrong I prefer it when you add real world sh*t just not as much as your doing cause I've seen numerous authors completely disregard that part of the story. You have a good story coming along, I hope I see more of your work.
Sors Mea Online (SMO) [Rough Version]
_LucXy
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I see what you mean. To be honest, I have little to no idea what I'm doing, since this is my first time writing a story. I am using this story as more of a "Template" for when, or if I make a better version of it. I also agree that the "Bully" aesthetic is extremely overused. And about the "Real World" and "VR" Parts of the story, there will always be more of that to come, but sorry nonetheless. I guess I did add a bit too many parts that didn't follow the "VR" Theme of my story. And about the Info, I guess I do seem to overhaul on a lot of it. I'll try to see what I could do about it. Thank you for the honest review, and I hope that you can point out some more things that seem "Over the top".