webnovel
MissMacabre
MissMacabreLv133yr
2021-04-27 08:49

This story has so much potential, but it’s lost in errors. First, the chapters are not in order, and most chapters are repeated. There are no transitions between paragraphs. It’s very easy to get confused while reading due to the mixed up chapters and non transitional paragraphs. There are a few grammatical and mechanical missteps, those are few, and easy to overlook. The biggest issue is how the author mixes up characters names. There is a character named Amy and a character named Aurora, in one chapter, the author used their names interchangeably. The main MLI is named Aurelius, and around chapter 40, his name suddenly becomes Kieran. The ending of the story drops off. It feels like the author was tired of writing and stopped, called it the end. Like I said, this story has great potential. The plot is good and interesting. It needs reworking. Perhaps, the author can do some editing to fix these things, and re-post it on Webnovel, or another writing/reading platform.

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