Writing Quality 🌟 The first ten chapters were great. If it would have kept the same non-serious Slice of Life story going out would have been a great story. The syntax and spelling is some of the best in this platform. So much so that at first I was confused by the mixed reviews and wondering why it wasn't on a more mainstream platform like Royal Roads rising stars or trending. As it turns out the reason is that start is just a catfish for a dark fantasy romance story that lurks right around the corner. A style that's much more dower and depressing. A real chore to read. It never recovers its tone and style at the start. Slowly it eats away at what you liked about it in the start until you look up, metaphorically speaking, and wonder how you got here from there. Truly a shame. But the depictions of torture and mind control of the love interest. For over thirty chapters as it amateurishly throws female leads at you left and right in total chaos best represents this series and why it isn't going to be going mainstream anytime soon. What on Earth were you thinking? You had such a good plot going. This is what creative writing does when you don't sit in the driver's seat doing outlines for the chapters and the arcs themselves. Storyboarding a chapter before and after you write it to make sure that it's not just enjoyable to read, but you got the tone across you wanted. And doing drafts so the overall product doesn't suck. A comedy of poor writer decisions. Sigh... Story Development 🌟 I don't think I need to say more there, do I? Character Design 🌟 🌟 🌟 They were well put together at first. Update Stability 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 There's over 400 chapters somehow. Probably because you skipped doing quality assurance writing? World Background 🌟 🌟 🌟 That lack of planning really shows here. The world-building can be said to be banal and likely written chapter to chapter. When normally you're supposed to write this first. I'll still rate it middling, because most amateur writers have no idea what a Literature Bible is anyway. Even if you pointed them at the Fallout Bible for instance? Some of them might even argue it overkill. 😆
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