Review Detail of TaintedMetal in The One My Heart Seeks

The story does deliver on the drama and events that surround the protagonist, from how his family treats him up until he becomes involved in crime. I enjoy the author's ideas of creating a suspenseful story featuring a character whose been though too much stuff to the point where he lives a life vastly different from his. I do however, have some criticism towards the overall structure of the story, which in my opinion is told too fast. While I do see Xavier interacting with the people around him, the flow is faster than I expected and I was hoping I could see more of it at a slower pace. There's also Xavier's attitude, which does go through a change before and after he was sent to prison but the changes are way to fast to portray. I understand he has kept a lot of anger in him, but I think it would be best to show his character development overtime, since he is the protagonist after all. Also, the shift from drama to crime is quite fast. Overall, the author has good ideas. I can see the potential in this story. There just needs to be some changes in the structure and some dialogue. I wish all the best for author and may this story be continued by them.