webnovel
MikruZero
MikruZeroLv44yr
2020-09-05 11:56

If you want to have a wide range of readers then about describing the story a bit much. It's a bit dragging and I can't help but persevere more minutes. The characters seem good. Story building is lacking. While the world background itself also needs work. Overall it's a good read if the readers like long and dragging more descriptive novels. Thanks for this novel!

Liked by 2 people

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Replies4
SolAce
SolAceAuthor

I see; would you recommend taking out those descriptions or scattering them more throughout the story ? Thanks for the constructive criticism, I’ll see if I can smooth things out ! (╹◡╹)

MikruZero
MikruZeroLv4

I'll dm you in discord later or tomorrow. Still writing sorry. We can exchange pointer there if you want.

SolAce:I see; would you recommend taking out those descriptions or scattering them more throughout the story ? Thanks for the constructive criticism, I’ll see if I can smooth things out ! (╹◡╹)
SolAce
SolAceAuthor

My discord account is ~Sol~#9950, so contact me there ^^

MikruZero
MikruZeroLv4

Already added you!

SolAce:My discord account is ~Sol~#9950, so contact me there ^^
Other Reviews
Tangerqueen
TangerqueenLv2

Honestly, I rarely give 5 star reviews and only when I think a book really deserves it. I haven't binge read something on this site for soooo long, and if all the books on here were like this one, I'd have so much more respect for it ;-; Writing Quality: Literally the prologue got me going like 0.0 It was just so beautifully put together? Like I'm not quite sure how to put it to words, but the moment I realized what the analogy was actually saying, I was low-key shook. That being said, there wasn't a single spot in this novel that wasn't beautifully polished such that every word felt like it had to be there. The tensions in the action scenes lived up to my expectations, as did the heart-warming ones. Story Development: If it wasn't for how clear your writing was, I think I would be lost with the switching between memories and reality sorta chapters. But literally because of how you set the mood and tone of the chapters depending on the emotions you were trying to convey, I had no issue going from mindset to mindset. Also, I think it actually made the current picture seem even more haunting with the juxtapositions. Character Design: Whistle. Enough said and more than enough reason for me to give a 5/5 for this. World Background: How do I put this. Not only do you describe the cells in a way that you make me want to punch the people (if you can even call them that) that put them there. But you also describe what seemed to be a utopia before it was corrupted, somehow making me want to punch them even more. Overall, I really want to say that this is a freakin gem. From the superrrr aesthetic cover art to the beautiful analogies and the story itself, I really really wish Webnovel would advertise your story more. Although it's still currently pretty sure, I think this novel would be one that actually somehow made an impact on me considering Webnovel as a platform. I think this is the first story I've added to my library from browsing the forums, but geez I'm glad I did!

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