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Hua_Li_An
Hua_Li_AnLv34yr
2020-09-03 11:29

"Memories Like a Dagger" is an exciting fantasy-action novel, with a unique presentation of its characters. Much like the prologue, the MC, Kalani, is confronted with two sides of himself and is plagued with contrasting memories. This bout of mystery and intrigue is surely to keep you reading on your seats. Points to consider: -Grammar: Although it's definitely better than most, it's not perfect, but it's getting there. I've placed a few comments here and there so it could get better. -General Storytelling: Some areas can get a bit dragging, but I believe it's a matter of preference of the readers. Also, the mood of the stories can change abruptly, so be careful of that. Great points: -Frankly, it's an incredibly interesting read. I can sense great potential the longer it goes, so this will surely have a place on my library. The author has done a great job with the plot and characterization, and even the newly introduced characters are interesting as well. To conclude, it's a really great story that makes you want to read more. I'm looking forward to more chapters! -

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Replies6
SolAce
SolAceAuthor

Glad you enjoyed my work, and I hope you continue to stick around ! ( ^∀^)

SolAce
SolAceAuthor

Also, which parts do you think was dragging ? Was it by chance chapter 12-13 ? (°▽°)

Hua_Li_An
Hua_Li_AnLv3

Sorry for the late reply! I think it's a matter of preference really. But if I should say something, it's in the little things. I personally like the long descriptions, and I write like that too but a friend of mine once told me that he preferred it to be straight to the point. But anyway, I like how it is now, so it really depends on your readers.

SolAce:Also, which parts do you think was dragging ? Was it by chance chapter 12-13 ? (°▽°)
SolAce
SolAceAuthor

Is it recommended to break up the descriptive parts and scatter them within the chapter ? I’ve heard that my descriptions can be a bit lengthy. And I also have a friend who prefers it to not be to lengthy.

SolAce
SolAceAuthor

Is it by chance due to my adjectives ?

Hua_Li_An
Hua_Li_AnLv3

I believe that is one good way to do it! Scattering them around can make sure it's not too much at once too. But, it's totally ok to have long descriptions especially if a new character/setting comes up. I guess it depends rlly on the situation involved.

SolAce:Is it recommended to break up the descriptive parts and scatter them within the chapter ? I’ve heard that my descriptions can be a bit lengthy. And I also have a friend who prefers it to not be to lengthy.
Other Reviews
Tangerqueen
TangerqueenLv2

Honestly, I rarely give 5 star reviews and only when I think a book really deserves it. I haven't binge read something on this site for soooo long, and if all the books on here were like this one, I'd have so much more respect for it ;-; Writing Quality: Literally the prologue got me going like 0.0 It was just so beautifully put together? Like I'm not quite sure how to put it to words, but the moment I realized what the analogy was actually saying, I was low-key shook. That being said, there wasn't a single spot in this novel that wasn't beautifully polished such that every word felt like it had to be there. The tensions in the action scenes lived up to my expectations, as did the heart-warming ones. Story Development: If it wasn't for how clear your writing was, I think I would be lost with the switching between memories and reality sorta chapters. But literally because of how you set the mood and tone of the chapters depending on the emotions you were trying to convey, I had no issue going from mindset to mindset. Also, I think it actually made the current picture seem even more haunting with the juxtapositions. Character Design: Whistle. Enough said and more than enough reason for me to give a 5/5 for this. World Background: How do I put this. Not only do you describe the cells in a way that you make me want to punch the people (if you can even call them that) that put them there. But you also describe what seemed to be a utopia before it was corrupted, somehow making me want to punch them even more. Overall, I really want to say that this is a freakin gem. From the superrrr aesthetic cover art to the beautiful analogies and the story itself, I really really wish Webnovel would advertise your story more. Although it's still currently pretty sure, I think this novel would be one that actually somehow made an impact on me considering Webnovel as a platform. I think this is the first story I've added to my library from browsing the forums, but geez I'm glad I did!

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