Review Detail of Eggy_does_writing in Doomsday Survival System

System/game stories are not my thing but this was pretty good! Sage is a very relatable character that the audience can easily sympathize with. I like how the author describes actions in this story. The part I didn't like was when the author would put text in [* I don't mind sound effects or noises being written like that but sometimes the author would write stuff like [*busy*]. It doesn't make sense to me and there were also a few grammatical issues. However, the rest of the story was pretty good!