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Oscillating_Sine
Oscillating_SineAuthor4yr
2020-06-02 09:59

Please actually give feedback that I can use when giving a ‘negative’ review. Also, use the spoiler option if you are going to actually talk about the story, and make sure to actually get the story plot right. Listing what happens in the story and giving a one star review literally leaves me with no way of improving based on the review.

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Nozz
NozzLv13

I'm a lover of all things that are Yuri book wise. Be it manga, fanfiction or novel, I can guarantee I have most likely read it. And more then likely on those novel occasions have I read stories because they had genderbent male to female heroine where they still like girls. Anyways I'm just gonna say that it's nice seeing more novel wise, and that I am looking forwards to reading more... On to the actual review!! Writing wise obviously there are gonna be mistakes as this book didn't come out long ago and most probably doesn't have a beta reader. Shown as the example of there being no beta when in one of the chapters a Penelope is hugging a Penelope in one of the carriage scenes between her and Tanya. With one of the Penelope's obviously supposed to be written as Tanya. BUT all in all its English and I don't have much to complain grammar wise and the mistakes don't occur much considering it hasn't been proof read. So not really gonna complain. Update wise as stated before the book hasn't been out long enough for it it have a reoccurring update schedule. So I've just rated it a five until further notice of future chapters to come. Stoty development... Who am I to comment on that when I haven't written the story. and different people have different preferences. So Ill just stick to the general factors. I myself am glad that you haven't spent a lot of time on the MC previous life before his death as reading about the past of them before they are even reborn into their new world I find to be rather activating, as they are just gonna die anyways so why waste the time writing three chapter up to their death scene? Ones enough for me! Pacing wise, pretty much skipped the childhood phase, but as I said preferences. I quite like it when the MC ages faster as it means the love interactions between them and future characters appears sooner. Character design... I LOVE THE MC AND THE MAID. but mostly the maid. As the maids personality is the type I like the most being cold and hard on the outside but when you push there buttons they don't know what to do and blush like hell. I can definitely say that character design is the is the stories strong suit. So nothing to complain about there. And finally world background. I mostly get it through snip-it's of conversation and the occasional paragraph which is okay. But compared to the characters whose personalities you can tell straight away through their actions which you have written. The world building is sadly quite lacking. It's like asking a character to describe where they live, but all they can do is say a sentence. So you know where they live and what the place is called. But you do not know what the place or the people that are in it, are like. But hey it's only 11 chapters in and has heaps of time to add more world building. All In all I like it and can't wait for more.

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