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Async0929
Async0929Lv14yr
2020-10-27 15:19

Hey there! Good day for writing! If you want to see whether you can earn from your current story or new ideas, you might want to contact rebecca.review@outlook.com. A brief introduction, some sample chapters, or links will be appreciated when reaching out.

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KingGeorg
KingGeorgLv14

So I have to admit I read only up to chapter 15 and all what Iโ€™m going to say now is purely based on the little what I have read. But at this point I think I will drop this light novel for the reasons as followed 1) I have problems to connect to the main character as well as the rest of the crew. This is mainly due to the fact that none of them really seems to have any profile whatsoever. All is great and all are nice and everything is perfect. There are basically no real inner conflicts. 2) The world building is non existing. You are in some country called England that is purely fictional as obviously there are banana trees and maybe even crocodiles existing in that area. But this is not actually the worst part as I could live with that. The real problem is that the structure of the world isnโ€™t either explained or plays any role for any of the characters... as obviously there is no real connection to England in the 16th century either or to any explained or shown hegemony. Why am I saying this? Well if you are a โ€œkingdomโ€ destroyed by some mercenaries who claims the land? At this point it seems people do a 3 day walk and simply settle down without any worry about things like taxes by whomever the land is actually owned .... which certainly is not the prince or the people or otherwise the necessity of kingship or kingdoms would be not necessary. It might also be the case that my understanding of what a king is in this story is wrong but itโ€™s not explained so if at all itโ€™s not my fault but the authors. 3) While there isnโ€™t much of inner conflicts visible there certainly are outer conflicts which are based on the โ€œletโ€™s build a village trope. While this certainly is interesting the lack there of character as mentioned under (1) makes it for naught for me. There is no excitement for the characters so why would I feel excitement for what they achieve? 4) Author tries to write in some romance ... sort of but for me it greatly suffers from (1) again let alone that how this romance is forced into a partnership is in my opinion ridiculous at best and missing the best part to explain why something evolves to that stage. It simply isnโ€™t enough to state that one has been childhood โ€œfriendsโ€? despite steep class difference from the get go. 5) Blind follower-ship is another problem I have. Again the author wasted potential in his story progression by giving him followers to his site that simply follow his whims to some degree just because he is their former โ€œKingโ€™sโ€ son even though they could do better on their own and probably better on their own instead taking him in between their mid while risking to be raided yet again.... why? So to sum it up my problem with this story is that it doesnโ€™t sufficiently explain why people do what they do. For people that donโ€™t care about this and simply love the building a village trope I can recommend this. But for everyone that likes a bit more thought out character and development I suggest trying it but not expecting to much. Maybe the later parts are better as I havenโ€™t read so much. But I donโ€™t want to waste my time either with a story that doesnโ€™t get me existed. Iโ€™m sorry and hope the author can learn something from this rantly review ;)

Ancient_
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