webnovel
LordSputnik
LordSputnikLv134yr
2019-12-09 01:24

Honest Review Found this one has potential, feels a lot like Sword Art Online. (A very hard to read version of it.) The Good: Character classes are unique and it is nice to see an MC that isn't 100% righteous for once. The Bad: Hard to follow... it jumps around a lot with little to no indication. I found the world setting kind of convoluted and some of the situations to be pointless. It feels like a lot of this is filler content so far because I really only care about Shiro and people he interacts with. The Neutral: Objectively describing someone as "sexy" leaves it open to interpretation, that's not a bad thing by itself, but who thinks it is sexy? (i.e. the observers, the characters, the readers, NPCs?) Maybe I missed it, but why are they stuck in the world? Maybe add a note that senshi = warrior and the significance of it so people don't think "WTF are senshis? Sounds like sushi!" or something like that. (Assuming that is what you meant it to be) Feel free to review back and I'll add you on Line if you would like editing help.

Emross Empire : War And Order (Eng-V.)

Shiro_MSFA
4.1
139 Chs

Liked by 3 people

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Replies1
Shiro_MSFA
Shiro_MSFAAuthor

Hard to follow... it jumps around a lot with little to no indication. I found the world setting kind of convoluted and some of the situations to be pointless. It feels like a lot of this is filler content so far because I really only care about Shiro and people he interacts with. (thank you for taking your time giving a review. but I showed many other character stories because I thought everything would have to do with what would happen in the future. but I highly accept your suggestion. I will try to change the flow of the chapters that I have not made. 50 and above.) The Neutral: Objectively describing someone as "sexy" leaves it open to interpretation, that's not a bad thing by itself, but who thinks it is sexy? (i.e. the observers, the characters, the readers, NPCs?) Maybe I missed it, but why are they stuck in the world? (Well i dont understand with sexy part. lol. but the reason why they are trapped will be explained when a new character appears. Maybe add a note that senshi = warrior and the significance of it so people don't think "WTF are senshis? Sounds like sushi!" or something like that. (Assuming that is what you meant it to be) (i laughed so hard with that sushi. well you right.. but senshi explanation in chapter 28-30.) yes please.. i will very very happy.. my line id is qyo25.

4yr
1
Other Reviews
RokuX
RokuXLv13

Very interesting and the parents are huge A**holes he I wish he could have chosen another race it would have been more fun and check it out if u like fanatsy and gaming

5yr

Shiro_MSFA
Shiro_MSFAAuthor

because someone asked and corrected my novel, so I made this statement. I have fixed the synopsis, hopefully it will be easier to understand. let me tell you a little plot. so actually there are two story lines, from 2 different novels. one is EEWAO and another is New World which I haven't published yet. the stories of the two novels are interconnected and when EEWAO is finished I will publish New World novel that I myself feel is very very good, because there are lessons in history, culture and so on from all over the world. I created EEWAO to remember my game friends and improve the quality of my writing before I published New World. so I hope when I make New World, the quality will be better. btw I am still learning to write, so your review is very useful for me.

5yr
Ucha_14
Ucha_14Lv4

sorry this id the last author.. due to a technical error, this story I moved to here.. there will be uploaded every day. Please support. And sorry once again..

5yr
Shiro_MSFA
Shiro_MSFAAuthor

hey .. if you have any kind of suggestion Monster can write your thoughts here .. I made this novel for my very good gamers friends .. especially Cloud, rome, Lyz and others .. hope they see this story ..

5yr
mark_zbr
mark_zbrLv2

quiet enjoy it, i wish it getting better, dont drop it. remember.. there are people who wait for this story. ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

5yr
otakumania
otakumaniaLv3

I've been looking for it, you should put a link or something if u want to move it. Hope everything ok and pls update faster lol. I'll always support u my friend..

5yr
Gamer_Desa
Gamer_DesaLv2

Nice!! keep goin thor.. gamer desa here support any Indonesian people who want to be novelis in webnovel. Wish the best for all Indonesian here.

5yr
kusuo_ssaiki
kusuo_ssaikiLv2

I havent read it yet, just take a look for while. Looks interesting and i will read it later after it has 10 or 30 chapter above. Btw is there any player from qatar in this novel?

5yr
Monkey_D_Obama
Monkey_D_ObamaLv4

Getting better, please improve more, like the items name, magic items, equipment stuff and something like that. Well the Monster is kind normal i think. But idk maybe u save beast monster for later.

5yr
Monkey_D_Obama
Monkey_D_ObamaLv4

What about Undead type Monster? Thats too much monkey i think, But there is no monkey d luffy or monkey d garp lol . I suggest to add some monster like Undead or something.

5yr
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