I really enjoyed the start especially since I'm assuming he has a bunch of legendary cards in his deck like it's zodia and the three Egyptian god cards keep it up man

It is not Very often that a work such as this is found amongst the trash heap on this platform, most stories that have potential are relagated to obscurity by the site in itself, that said it makes it all the better when a story such as this is unearthed and given its dues such as this, that being said the dedication of the readers and the budding brilliance of the author is admirable, especially so in that the author chose one of the most difficult works to base his story in, the story has a large amount of potential, the untapped source improving upon the already good design, the characters have some development over their originals but their is more to be seen so i cannot properly judge, the background has been improved immensely, however their is more to be seen, over all i give this story a 4.6 out of five, a exellent score for the author.

muito bom, continue assim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Excellent history! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's one of those fabrics that your gonna say "more!" Because the book is too good to be true for a fanfic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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okay so love that your doing a yugioh novel as its what I used to watch as a child and brings back memories. Wish more people write about it but doesnt seem that popular to them. There are many problems with this however witch makes it hard to read. Firstly its so broken, you need to work on the flow a lot more and your grammar. another problem is you havent rly made the story into your own yet. He is just following 5Ds gang. We did see some change when we learnt some backstory and the tournament witch was good. personally for me its little but you kept getting the names of the moves and even the incantation for ra wrong... idk might just be me but it annoyed tf outta me. and you even got his ability wrong... theres some other stuff but thats the main things. Finally with the pairing for me Id have chosen misty and simply bc in every 5ds fic its always akiza so having misty would have been a nice change. Even thou you went with akiza in the end I didnt mind it much but what annoyed me was later on you went to harem for no reason. (As why would you ask in the first place for the pairing?) I can only assume its the horny lil kids who shout harem harem in the comments on every chap. You see it in every story and all I can say and hope is that you ignore them. Make the story as you want. Romance is key for any story and it can either make or brake a novel so...

Fantastic !!!!!! It's more fantastic if you up this fast up this fanfic😁🅰🅰😁😁😁😁😁 🅰😁😁🅰😁😁🅰😁 🅰🅰🅰🅰😁🅰🅰🅰 🅰😁😁🅰😁😁🅰😁 🅰😁😁🅰😁😁😁😁

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