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AutumnSolstice13
AutumnSolstice13Lv44yr
2020-12-19 16:53

Hi Author, I just started reading your story and I would like to share some of the things I noticed in your novel. I think the story is really fast-paced and lacks the build up of the world and the character that is needed. I hope that the progression of the story would be a bit more enticing as your idea is amazing as the chapters felt rushed and boring. All the Best! xo

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Replies1
Ichiryuu
IchiryuuAuthor

There are some that pointed out that one so I tried my best to fix that at the later chapters. Still, I'll try my best to slow down the phase as to not make it boring. Thank you for the advice!

Other Reviews
akserhy
akserhyLv14

Read 20 chaoters : The premise and concept of this novel is good and well written. The only thing I can't accept is the author's blatant use of words which are contradictory. 1) He tells the 5 year kid is as mature as a youngster then that means he should be as matured as an adult when he turns 10.But the author writes that Belle and MC plays around when she visits him.🀯. Does this mean they are doing some adult stuff playing ?? They should compete with each other to check their progress as Belle is too competitive as said by author but nope they play around. 2) Dragon in this world lays very small eggs and two dragons come out of a single egg as they are twin and they simply bond with each of the MC and Belle.THICC Plot armor. 3) The author does not know about cause and effect. He writes whatever he wishes and events happens without any cause and consequences. 4) Nobody wanna kill/harm/kidnap MC. Only the dark alliance wants it and rest all wanna worship mc as god. 5)He is as mature as a youngster but cant say no to Belle cause his Body is still a KID. 6) Everything happens in favor of mc (THICC PLOT ARMOR).He is a happy go lucky naive kiddo with maturity. I hate reading story where everything is smoothsailing for mc who is naive idiotic but author keeps portraying him as intelligent and mature. This makes the story a FAIRY TALE and I have grown up from Fairy Tales. There is no suspense and thrill in reading fairytales. So If you like Fairytales this novel is for you. Alas its not for me.

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