webnovel
Clouded_Jade
Clouded_JadeAuthor6yr
2018-11-19 10:18

Hello, this is the author, Yun Yin! (Insert shameless self-promotion here...) I am a new writer on Webnovel, and this is my first time writing a cultivation novel, so please leave behind any comments/criticisms, they will be very helpful! Enjoy! :) (Not actually stable in updates but.... T_T)

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Replies2
Jackhf
JackhfLv3

Keep up the good work! Need more updates, can't get enough of this novel! ;)

Clouded_Jade
Clouded_JadeAuthor

Thanks! ;)

Other Reviews
dfe2
dfe2Lv3

I came to this novel when it was featured two months ago. Being the only "newly minted" novel without a single review or many views among the others in the list, I decided to give it a try, Looking at the caution about the novel possessing multiple main characters, it was rather unexpected. And to be completely honest, I was blown away. As a cultivation novel, the cultivation scheme is truly unique from the other novels I read so far. Although the naming scheme is similar to others, following the generic Xianxia format, the novel begins by introducing two concepts of existences, mortal and immortal, with distinct differences between them. The concept of immortals sacrificing a fundamental component of their existence in exchange for a true immortal life, and mortals unable to reincarnate once they begin cultivating, is truly a fascinating idea for a novel. Just by reading the novel with a cleared mind, it's fairly obvious that the way in which certain terminology are explained and introduced - by bouncing around a concept among multiple protagonists - allows for the reader to quickly understand without having to search on Google. The fight scenes are relatively short, ending in a few exchanges, and I like that a lot. Not only does the clean, detailed description of each technique represents the author's dedication to the novel and the story's world alongside of its intrinsic elements, the novel doesn't deviate in a way that would confuse a reader who has never picked up a cultivation novel before. Yes, a few exchanges in a fight may be short for some readers, but it adheres to the concept that a fight generally consists of a few lethal blows, maybe longer fights if they are evenly matched, not to mention that the battles aren't skewed towards the protagonists. The management between the three protagonists is simply amazing and worthy of respect. Not only are these characters interconnected in one profound way or another, the "plots" of each protagonist aren't independent routes. The decision of organizing the story in a chronological format, rather than a volume per character, is rather courageous and commendable. Not only do the readers get to know what happens in other places at the same time, it also represents change over time in society, cultivation hierarchy, or some other event - the novel possesses that potential, unlike many others at the early developmental stages. Personally, I wished for there to be a little more dialogue. However, as I read on further, I realized that there was indeed no need to. The author adopts a considerably slower plot development rate than others, but is compensated for by detailed world building. Everything is properly introduced before the character makes their entry, and is defined in easily understandable layers. The internal monologue of characters are exquisitely described by action and not in a subform of dialogue, which is another interesting trait of the novel, one I have not seen for a long while. If possible, this novel definitely needs to get the attention of many others. It's a superb piece of work, and although it's only on the first volume, the author's sheer work and care for the novel is fairly obvious.

Jackhf
JackhfLv3

I've been following this novel ever since it was first written, and I have to say, it is one hell of a story. Three protagonists and yet the writing doesn't seem clunky at all, amazing! The first thing that pops up is the style in which the author adopts cultivation. Instead of slowly presenting every topic and concept one by one as the plot progresses, the author visits both extremes at the same time, the implementation of multiple protagonists a very good approach in not only introducing the concept to the reader, but also explaining it from the character's point of view. While sometimes overlapping definitions can be slightly redundant, it is also necessary and what makes this novel so special - in that the differences in characters' actions are accurately portrayed. Though the novel's plot has not significantly developed yet, the author has yet to fall into the trap of repetitive, dull characters that seem to only exist as temporary articles to give the protagonist a power up or technique, etc. However shortly defined or lack of definition attributed to a character, it's easily observable that the novel has potential - the characters all seem to have some significance to the protagonists' behaviors. The lack of dialogue and explosive drama is one thing, but I think it is more than compensated for by the slow but steady buildup, and the author's methodology of displaying internal monologue by actions, not ****** statements. Although there isn't much talking in the initial portions of the novel, I can see that it was intentional - after all, it would be rather odd for a character to be talking to themselves unless there was something wrong with their consciousness. Dialogue is present when there are multiple characters and conversation would facilitate the character and plot development, and world building. Dialogue isn't present when characters are in a solo environment to indicate that they are alone, and that conversation isn't required to advance the plot, instead focusing on world development. The balance in which the author manages this for not just a single protagonist, but three, is simply superb. Though early, the novel truly begins to shine its potential here. The best part about the novel until now, is the fighting scenes, and the world development. Just from reading, the attention to detail and descriptive words allows for the reader to simply relax and envision the scene enacting in their mind - without any need to wonder what exactly a certain technique entailed in a typical cultivation novel. The techniques displayed by the characters are completely realistic with implementations of supernatural phenomena, which makes the novel even more fantastic. The attention and care the author gives to the novel is obvious, and as a reader, I'm thankful for that. I would say the only problem here would be the lack of a 'daily update', so to speak. Although the author posts around the same time each day, I would suggest establishing publishing timers to appear on the "Daily Updates" tab. Good Work!

wolven
wolvenLv10
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