Writing: 5 Solid. Nothing to really say. Updates: 5 For some, once a week might be too slow, but maybe I’m biased because I do knce a week too, but I think this frequency is fine. Also, your chapters are longer than mine. Compared to stories that update more frequently with much shorter chapters, I prefer the once a week long length. Story: 4 True to what’s forewarned on the Info page, the story progresses slower than most stories. We don’t see any real action/conflict until after chapter 8. From there on to chapter 20, we finally get through preparation for an upcoming fight. For some, this’ll definitely be a turn off, but for the patient and appreciate of good, detailed writing, this is no issue. Personally, however, I do wish it could speed up by at least 50% as I felt like I was mostly reading dialogue towards the end of the 20 chapters. Character: 4 MC Deus is pretty realistic and isn’t some annoying or egotistical dude. Droh is a nice little sidekick albeit their meeting felt a little too spontaneous to me like hey there, and then let’s move and go fight together. The details on Deus “experiment” status and Droh as a monkey Faun is pretty unique. The other dudes seem like jerks though, so hoping for some new likable characters (or good realistic villains). Additionally, I feel like we can delve into the minds of the main two more, especially Droh. World: 5 Solid as it’s what author said would be and it is. Slow, detailed progression and explanation. There’s even a whole chapter on weapondry. Only thing I might like a little more of is setting ambiance. I’m not quite getting the full sci-fi feel yet. Overall: I think you’re doing a great job. My only concern is that the slow, deliberate will push readers away. So readers, do push on past the 20 chapter mark to really get a feel of the story direction and imperative. Funny enough, this sorta reminds me of my own story. I focus on world building a lot in the beginning, and I have a human and animal sidekick too. XD
Liked by 1 people
LIKE*once *appreciative *deliberate pace
<3 Wonderful review and I agree with pretty much everything you've stated. Yeah, I'd love to speed up the earlier bits a tad without losing the world and characters that were developed in the mean time. Definitely a ton of dialogue without much else in the way of substance... at least my world didn't disappoint. I also love how you noticed that there was pretty much a single chapter entirely about weaponry and gear, trying to build a bit of lore around the fighting styles available etc etc. I'll definitely work on ambiance, an issue I've struggled with no doubt. In my head, I can see everything, it all makes sense... the issue is translating that onto paper without looking like a bumbling fool. hahaha The sci-fi was mainly revolving around the flying ships, the guns, etc etc, but I'll definitely work harder in the future and in any revisions to elaborate further and explore everything more. Glad my characters stuck with you, though. Definitely a lot of jerks and sassy people, but I'm hoping that you enjoy upcoming people that I've got coming up. Some people may seem rude and offensive, but are more tsundere (even though I typically don't like to use that description, but 4th wall breaking, eh). Thanks again for the thorough and awesome review, and I'm glad you've enjoyed reading. It's so cool that you've been able to see similarities between my work and yours, really interesting. :) Great minds, right? So yeah, I'll try and figure out a way during a revision or cleaning one day to make the opening chapters feel more approachable for newcomers. :D
