Review Detail of Rojikku in Legacy: Lord Alba

I actually haven't read more than half the first chapter. I just need to say: Look up how to use f*cking punctuation! Did you not go to school? Even if you didn't, I see mention of an editor. How do neither of you know how to write dialogue?! Did you never read a book before?! It's literally in all of them! Why are you writing everything so weird? It's distracting from the story, which I would otherwise definitely be immersed in right now.