webnovel
harem4life
harem4lifeLv66yr
2018-09-02 03:03

Since you wanted some advice I came in with an open mind. To be honest it is great the idea is new and it’s pretty refreshing. So my first piece of advice before critising is keep the chapters flowing it’s really good and keep writing the story the way you like it if stuck you can ask the fans for help. The second there will alway be bad apples so you ignor bad comments. Now advice first things first separate into paragraphs cuz it makes it easier to read and appear longer. Two this is my opinion but use “ for speech and ‘ for thought. Lastly I got a little confused and it happen at the beginning like offer a gd background story so we can understand MC. Is he ordinary or are they renown for something like martial arts etc. we know he a naruto fan the next thing is what transfered his soul or his body. Can a speculation be made that it was a reverse summoning scroll etc. this story is gd but keep it consistent so we know his power ups and the logic behind how he got it. I hope this helps and my last peace of advice as I have to harems tend to work so you can like do that like Ino hinata mix with sexy anko. 😎😉

Resurrection of a punished Clan

Doishi
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2 Chs

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