Review Detail of vorlefan in Apocalyptic World: I've Got The Second System

My overall feedback: 1 - It lacks a unique flavor for the MC in his usage of words and descriptions. I mean, to embed when he is describing things with his personality. Be it sarcasm, funny jokes to cope with the stress, and so on. 2 - Some scenes is a bit confuse even for a Apocalipse scene. I know its challenging, but I think that when you hit right in the unique voice for your MC, things will happen more naturally. 3 - Try to avoid repeating some words, like 'eerie', 'cacophony'. All in all, you have a new reader, keep up the good work :)