The grammar makes it nearly unreadable, it's not to the point where you would have to manually edit it all to see it as a coherent story, but it takes away from it as a hole
Vanhelsing_Kai
Liked it!
GOSTARIf you have trouble with English then you should use Grammarly, it's a free program that'll help you out a ton with writing in the future.
Vanhelsing_Kai:i get what you mean... just I made this by my own and I am still 18 and sorry for the bad English.... my English is not that good .. my English a bit to Asian sorry