9. 9: Unwanted

Even before he saw her lips start to quiver, Mike knew exactly what was happening. He knew this was severely hurting El and he needed to stop it, but he just stood, frozen and powerless as he watched her face crumple up. The bottoms of her chocolate eyes were brimming with tears and he had witnessed this enough to know she was trying to be strong and fight it. His chest ached as he watched her attempt to swallow her emotions, his mind screaming at him to intervene.

It was Saturday morning and all had been peaceful at the Wheeler house before their doorbell rang and Hopper marched El through the front door. When Mike saw the look on the face of his favorite person in the whole world, he almost cried out, but he quickly bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself.

Apparently, Hopper had something extremely important he needed to discuss, not just with Mike's family, but with the Byers, Henderson's and Sinclair's as well. One by one, the families of his best friends trickled into his house, just as completely confused as he was. None of them had any idea what was going on and Hopper wouldn't talk until everyone was present.

"Adults, I need to speak to you" Hopper said in a gruff voice. "Only the adults" he added, glaring at the kids. The parents hesitantly followed Hopper to the other side of the room, who motioned to El to join them as well.

They attempted to keep their voices down, but the four best friends could clearly understand what they were saying while they huddled in a corner. The boys shot each other worried glances as Hopper described what had happened the night before.

El had a nightmare. A really bad one, apparently. In fact, it scared her so much that, in her sleep, she had completely destroyed her room using her powers. According to Hopper, it looked like a hurricane had come crashing into her room. All of her furniture, with the exception of her bed, had snapped right in two, a good chunk of the wallpaper had been ripped away from the walls, and all her belongings had been thrown aimlessly across the floor. But the worst part was that, when Hopper ran in to check on her, she had accidentally shoved him violently back into the wall, knocking him out cold.

The adults' eyes grew wider and wider the more Hopper's story progressed and when he begged for one of them to take her in, he was met with a stunned silence. All eyes were on Hopper...well, all except Mike's. He couldn't pry his eyes away from El, who was sniffling and rapidly blinking back tears as she stared at the ground with her arms wrapped around her.

He hated seeing her in this state...even though it had happened several times before, each time got worse-for him and for her. His friends were starting to glance at him, instinctively knowing he was the only one who could help her while he stood, paralyzed.

There was no doubt in his mind that Hopper would come around and eventually get some sense knocked into him. He was just frustrated right now, so Mike kept his attention on El. The adults were currently reasoning with Hopper and from where they were standing, they could tell the parents knew he would calm down eventually, but they still made it very clear that El had to stay with Hopper.

"I DON'T WANT HER, KAREN!" he shouted suddenly, his frustration reaching a boiling point.

Mike gasped and watched as El clapped a hand over her mouth to keep a heartbreaking whimper in. She turned and sprinted out of the room and Mike didn't even have to think twice about running after her, ignoring all the shocked faces in the room.

As soon as she slammed the door, the sobs came. She took a couple shaky steps to the window on the side of the room, hating the vulnerable sounds that she couldn't stop making. The tears blurred her vision as she looked out at Hawkins, the only home she had ever known.

She loved it here. This was the place where she felt like she belonged...but with Hopper's words ringing in her ears, she wasn't so sure of that anymore and it was breaking her. It was a complete accident, what she had done to Hopper but it just proved that she was still dangerous.

Dangerous. The more she thought about that word, the more she wished she could just disappear so she wouldn't accidentally hurt anyone ever again. The last thing she wanted was to be a threat to the people she cared about.

She kept both hands firmly pressed against her mouth to muffle her cries, the salty tears running over her fingers and down her chin.

When the door opened, she didn't turn around. She was a mess. There was only one person who could see her like this and she prayed with everything she had that they were behind her.

A strong, steady pair of arms encircled her waist and she sighed in relief, only to have it immediately turn back into a sob. He knew. Simple as that. Mike knew that when she was on the edge of a breakdown, all she needed was something to physically hold on to. She never verbally told him that. But that's just how well they understood one another.

Moving her hands away from her mouth, she grasped onto his arms as if she was dangling from a cliff and he was the only rope keeping her from falling into a downward spiral. She felt him rest his cheek against her head and while it would seem his presence would calm her down, it only broke her more. Sobs threatened to continue to shake her body and somehow, he felt her resistance to them.

"Let it out. Trust me, I'm right here."

So she did. Right there in his arms, she broke down. Digging her fingers into Mike's wrists, her raw cries filled the room and the tears dripped in a constant stream down her face. His grip tightened and he held fast to her.

Everything hurt. She felt as if the emotional pain was choking her and she couldn't breathe as her sobs were released and her chest heaved up and down with every broken cry.

He kept her pressed against him as she let out a final, shattered scream and then, just like that, the pain was gone. She sagged back into him, feeling numb and completely worn out, her head falling against his chest.

He slowly sank to the ground, bringing both of them to a sitting position, El still leaning all of her weight against him. In the sudden, deafening silence she not only became aware of her shallow breathing, but his shaky breaths as well. When she glanced down at his arms, she noticed they were trembling. She spun around to face him and for the first time since this whole ordeal started, she got a look at his face.

The sudden movement made him fall backwards and when his arms caught his fall, he stayed in that position. His eyes met hers and she finally noticed something she had missed during her meltdown.

Mike was crying too.

The pain was clear on his face as a single tear fell from his eyes. She saw his anguish in the way his eyebrows were creased, his chin quivered and his body shook.

'He's hurt...because of me…' El thought. 'What have I done?' She felt awful, but she didn't know what to do, so she inched closer to him, wincing at the way he bit his lip to keep it from trembling.

After a couple beats, he timidly raised his hand and placed on El's cheek. Without hesitation, she did the same to him, brushing away one of his tears with her fingers. Their heavy, agonizing breaths became synchronized as they stared into each other's eyes and watched the pain disappear.

Finding her voice, El whispered, "Mike, I'm s-"

He cut her off almost immediately. "Don't be sorry. You hear me?"

Her eyes flickered around his face, looking for some sign that he was lying, but all she found was compassion. The teensiest smile eased onto his face and she let out a shaky exhale. Bringing her hand away from his face, she slid it over the one cradling hers, never breaking eye contact. She eventually nodded, a sign that he recognized immediately.

It meant she understood.