Snippet 5

"CRAY CRAY MA V"

(REATLEGILE RA AGENT M)'s POV

It's Saturday afternoon. The funeral went very well, We laid the Deathies in peace and honor. I still don't believe The Deathies are gone you know, I don't believe my brothers left me alone, Noh this is just a nightmare. I am still at the cemetery but now I am at my wife's grave-site. I haven't visited her grave in a while, well a lot of things have been happening lately. I didn't abandon her of course. Next week is her birthday and our anniversary, I was still gonna come.

While I was still sitting there alone, someone spoke behind me.

Voice.: "You are whipped bro, even when she is resting in peace she still drives you crazy." I quickly wiped a tear that was running down my chic fast and turned to look at the person.

Me.: "Well well look what the wind has dragged in..Heeeh Ma V man. What are you doing here man.?" I went to him and bro hugged him while holding his hand. Well Ma V is my cuz.

Ma V.: "Really dude, Are you going to ask me that question.? Well, I am here to get something to drink." I chuckled, that's funny though. You know I forget how fucked up this fool is.

Me.: "Gin and Tonic, coming right up sir." I said that imitating a British Butler. We both laughed and became serious..

Ma V.: "I see, you don't want to grow up neh khehla(Old man)." I showed him a middle finger.

Me.: "Look who's talking, Colour black telling grey that it is darker. Fuck you dude, I am like 5 years younger than you." He smiled and showed me a middle finger too.

Ma V.: "I am older than you only when you want to, fuck you too and you for that too." I Chuckled.

Me.: "Yeah it is supposed to be that way man.. On a serious note, what brings you man."

Ma V.:"Uya hlanya ndoda,( You are a mad man) it doesn't have to be that way, I am your brother..Well i.... " His phone rang interrupting him from answering the question.. he picked up the call

Ma V: "Baby, Sorry I am on my way." He listened " Ohk, just for peace's sake take the car I will come with my cuz, I am with him as we are speaking. Are you sure you will be able to drive though.?" He listened again.... " Ok and I love you too, Munch. Tata(Bye bye) Nana Mbaaaah." He ended the call.

Me.: "And who is the lucky lady, Oh ngwana modimo ncncncnc ( Oh child of God ncncncnc.)"

Ma V.: "My soon to be wife." I Chuckled.

Me.: "Nice name it's too long though." He chuckled..

Ma V.:"Mxaah, o fucked up laiti yaka, Ha ke batle go go aketsa.( You are fucked up Lil bro, I don't want to lie.)"

Me.: "So what if I disapprove riding with you, Wa go vaya ka maoto.?(You will walk.?)"He looked at me with a worried facial expression..

Ma V.:"Gazi ha.a ska ntira yalo.(Bro no don't that to me.)" I Chuckled, stood up, and walked away he was still sitting at a bench located in front of my wife's grave... "Jo, ha.a Mfetho so serious wang ginda.?( Dude No man, so are you really leaving me behind.?)"

Me.: "Are vaye, or o batla go vaya ka maoto.?( Let's leave or do you really want to walk.?)" He stood up and tried to catch up with me.

Ma V.: "Mblomele daar, Wa itsi ke bolaiwa ke Gaoto.( Wait for me, you know Gaut is killing me.)" I busted out with laughter...

Me.: "And You will arrive at the gate dead, I think I should dig a grave for you klaar.."

Ma V.: "Haaaah fuck you man it's not funny nxn." I kept on laughing. You know this fool lightened up my day.. I have been sad before he came, but I am recovering ay.

Me.: "So le nou ha o tlogo mpolelela gore entlk o tletseng hier.(So you are still not going to tell me why are you here.?) "

Ma V.: "So lwena ntse o sa fonte gore ke sgitha le Lewelana le Rasta.? Ne ke tlile go tshegetsa ena.(You didn't know that I am dating Rasta's twin sister too.? I was here to support her.)". I Chuckled and stopped still containing a grin.

Me.: "Oh, That's why Jahman ntse a sa go batle yana..(Oh That's why Jahman disliked you so much.)"

We arrived at the gate and this fool saw my Car, He took a very loud whistle. Here goes drama..

Ma V.: "Yuyuyuyuyu!!!! Intshimbi ya Majeremane!!!, I nkosi ye ndlela, Umshini woku gawul'indlela ngoku I ngenelela...."

Me.: "Come on dude, shut it, man, people are looking at us. It's just a car."

Ma V.:"This is not just a car!!!. Sheba grill tseo saan.(Look at those grills). Di soh(They are like)". He lifted his nostrils with his index finger, I Chuckled mxm this fool.. "BMW 8 series G15 Baby!!. Can I drive.?". I looked at him in a very serious look.

Me.: "No, Dude you want to crash my car ka gauto eo ya gago.(With that gaut of yours.)" He laughed...

Ma V.: "Neke dlala maan hakena gauto.(I was just kidding man, I don't have gaut).You can step on my feet to prove it." I laughed very hard, mxm this fool is Cray cray..

Me.: "I wouldn't let it pass you, phela o owna chesa nyama.(Because you are owning a Pub and Grill.)" I threw my car key and we got inside the car and we drove off.

ON THE WAY..

Ma V.: "Hookay!!, Hookay!!, Hookay!!! Hoooright!! Hibiri!!!. So how much is it.?" He asked with a huge smile..

Me.: "Ninety-three thousand five hundred and forty-four point four five." I said that imitating Jacob Zuma. His smile faded followed by a frown

Ma V.: "Heh.?. Come again Say what.?" I smirked this is where I want him.

Me.: "British Pounds of course, in cash.." He swallowed hard, I chuckled.. Mhhh that moment was priceless, get it.?

Ma V.: "Heh wareng yong.?( What are you saying, man.?)" He was serious.

Me.: "Dude, This car is worth your chesanyama. Just crash with it you will see me." He looked at me and pulled over the car..

Ma V.: "Neh, yong Idrivele Koloi ya gago yong.(No man drive your car....)". I Chuckled softly. We both got out of the car exchanging seats and drove off.

Me.: "Dankie my bra.(Thanks bro.)" I Chuckled and we drove in silence for a while.

Ma V.: "So diwang..?(What's up.?). Ra go dibusa kae.?(where are we going to party.?.)"

Me.:"I am going home.." he chuckled.

Ma V.: "Huhu, Party popper. Come on Pastor Panana(Banana). Let's go to that place we last went le The Deathies.. (With The Deathies). Kana leina la teng keng.? (What's the name of the place again.?)"

Me.: "Dude I said I am going home!!!. Which words are not lucid in that statement.?" He looked at me.

Ma V.: "I understand that you are upset and you are feeling emotional. Mara stop beating and blaming yourself about what happened, But don't you think The Deathies need the last farewell.. They would have done it too if it was you, who was deceased.". You know he is right. I think I should go, I mean I have nothing to lose...

Me.: "Ohk, it's fine we will go."

Ma V.: "Great, bravo bravo!!!." We arrived

Me.: "Dude I will see you later then." I dropped him off and I left going home.

.7 HOURS LATER.

Ma V.: "Ka zwakala Bafo nou nou.(I am coming now.)" He was breathing heavily...

Me.: "Sure, Entlk what's taking you so long.? Oh o busy ka shebelakwano neh...? Ao Naledi wa batho, Her brother...( You busy having sex neh. Oh pity Naledi)". Before I finished the sentence, something caught my eyes. I saw a person in the form of a ghost in the middle of the road coming in my direction.. Mxm I have met Demons I am not going to be intimidated by a Ghost.. Shit, it's Rasta, speak of the Devil. I ended the call and stepped out of the car, sat on my car hood, and folded my hands....

Me.: "I see even when you are dead you are still smoking Soldier..." He stopped and looked towards me slowly.

Rasta.: "Suh yuh cya si mi.?( So you can see me.?)"

Me.: "Yah.."

Rast.: "Ohh Give thanks to Jah.(Thank you Jah.).... Finally sum'ady cya si an hear mi.( Finally there's someone who sees and hears me.")

Me.: "Wa gwaan.?(What's up.?)"

Rast.: "Wah yuh ah duh here.?(What are you doing here.?)" His face changed, rage started taking over by a second. Overprotective as always..

Me.: "No..No!! It's not what you are thinking, O ntsaya yang mare heh.?(How are you taking me. Huh.?) Ke bona Naledi jaaka ncosi ya ko gae.(I see Naledi as my Sibling) I would never date with her. Nx."

Rast.: "Den whah yuh ah duh here.?..(Then what are you doing here.?)" I have to lie to him to avoid World War 3, Know very well if I tell him, I am here to fetch Ma V, shit will hit the fan.. I don't know how long will the lie last ay..

Me.: "I was here to check up on her and wena what are you doing here.? Aren't you supposed to be resting in peace or burning in hell man.?"

Rasta.: "Dat di reason mi here man.(That's the reason I am here man.)"

Me.: "Mi lose man wuh yuh mean.?( I am lost man what do you mean.?)"

Rasta.: "Mi trap between di land of di living and di land of di deceased cuz of har.(Am trapped between the land of the living and the land of the deceased because of her.)" Huh.? No does that mean he's here to kill her..?

Me.: "What do you mean because of her.? So o her go mo bodisa.?(So are you here to kill her.?)"

Rasta.: "You outta yuh mind.? Di reason me here cuz shi bug wa fi lego of mi inna har heart.Di bond wi share since wi did conceived di one trapping me to pass tru. It's like shi tinks mi nuh dead an shi nuh wa fi accept.(Are you out of your mind.? The reason I am trapped is that she doesn't want to let go of me in her heart. The bond we share since we were conceived is the one that is trapping me to pass through. It's like she thinks I am not dead... And she doesn't believe." Oh, so he is here to make her believe that he is dead ok..

Me.: "Maybe she thinks you are not dead, you faked your death just like when the cartels were after you."

Rasta.: "She has to accept that I am a dead man, or I am going to be stuck here for eternity.If I don't make her accept my death before the rises tomorrow, I must consider myself stuck for eternity." Shit, that's something very complicated...

Me.:"So how are you going to do this since she can't hear and see you.?"

Ma V.: "Eh Gita!!!. O ova le mang daar.?!!(Hey Dude who are you talking too there.?)" He said walking towards. Shit, I didn't see him.

Rasta.: "You!!" He said that charging towards Ma V, grabbed him with his throat, and lifted him..shit shit.Ma V was choking, shit how am I going to ask Rasta to stop this nonsense without freaking Ma V out... Shit shit.

**** You have the abilities to mind communicate fool****

Me.: ***Wait what.? I can do what.?***

Baphomet.: ***Don't be a fool, Your relative is going to die if you don't act quickly.***

Me.: ***Ras!! Ras!! you are killing him man and his death will hurt her even worse. It will break her man, think about her man. Losing her lover on the day she buried her twin brother. It will break her man, leave what you are doing soldier it's an order!.***

He released him. He coughed historically while holding his knees struggling to catch his breath...

Rast.: "He is lucky that she loves him Nx" Phew what a relief. Now I must cook up another lie errrr..

Me.: "Hey man are you ok.?" Said patting his back gently

Ma V.: "What the fuck just happened man.? One second I was talking to you the other thing I am suddenly choking. If I was drunk I would say it's because of the alcohol.." Got him

Me.:"When last did you drink water.?"

Ma V.:"Ehh umm...."

Me.: "You are dehydrated man.."

Ma V.: "Heh.?..." I interrupted him.

Me.: "Don't worry you will be fine. Wena just-drinks enough water. Anyway, how is she holding up man.?" He knows who am I talking about, I asked that question to brush off what happened...

Ma V.: "She is going to be fine, You know how much of a tough cookie she is... Like a brother , like a sister.."

Rast.: "Yeah you are right Dickhead!!!"

Me.:"Yah she will come around, it's just a matter of time. Where is she.? I need to see her."

Ma V.: "She is already asleep. Let's go man you will see her tomorrow."

Rasta.: "This is my chance to do what I am here for.. Wish me, luck bro." I touched my head with my index finger..

Me.: ***Break a leg Brother man***. "Let's go then," I said getting inside the car and Ma V got inside the car too and we drove off..

Ma V.: "Entlk what does this Dehy what what got to do with my choking earlier on, I was even floating man.?" There we go again..

Me.: "Floating.? Hhaah man are you mad.? Come on man your girlfriend is a doctor, you should be knowing these things. You see your brain stopped to send information through your cervical nerves and made a miasma of deprecable apotheosis in a hemorrhagic oozing into malodorousness excrescences of mobocracy, with all termagant ossifying proclivities of aristocracy and your knowledgia centura is enveloped in paraplegic crinum which shutted the whole cervical and made you chock temporarily. As for the floating feeling was just an Illusion your system made."

Ma V.:"Whatever ever man. Let's go have some fun." Good phela I don't have time to make up Scientific gibberish the whole night.

We arrived at the nightclub. The place was packed to the ceiling, the parking area was full like shit. While I was still searching for parking I saw something remarkable, The parking that I once used 11 years ago when those guys stole my car wheels was the only one unoccupied.

Me.: "I don't believe this man."

Ma V.: "Eng.?(What.?) Man.?"

Me.: "We are parking from the very same parking, I once parked on when Magita stole my car wheels."

Ma V.: "Ere o maka Gita.(You are lying dude.)".

Me.: "Serious man, I swear on my wife and Children's grave man."

Ma V.: "Ok man, What a coincidence, it sounds too good to be true, man. Let's go inside and Parday duch!! duch!! duch!! duch!!." He chuckled.. while opening the doors.

Me.:"You know you are a toddler trapped in the body of an adult " He chuckled and showed me a middle finger... I locked the car and walked away.

Ma V.:"Fucken msono.(cunt)"

Me.:"Nawe(You too). Nx."