Chapter one-hundred-and-nineteen

My arms are around him, and then I hear a tiny thud as he drops the remote to wind his arms around me. The wave of emotions I've been holding back comes rushing out at once, and I'm afraid of pouring it all into him.

Into my shoulder, I hear Harry sniffling. And I'm chortling through my sobs when he says: "Let it all out."

I try not to squeal out in surprise, because I think I can feel his wave of emotions too. I take it all in, I breathe him in, and every memory of him flashes in mind. For a minute, I'm blinded, and I can't hear anything but him breathing through his sobs.

"You too, then, Harry," I say, and his chuckle vibrates through my shoulder.

I don't know how much time passes with us just holding each other, but my arms start to cramp a little, and I think his do too, because we both loosen but don't let go. Our breaths slow in sync.

"Can I tell you something?"

"Sure."

He glides away from me, taking everything in. His eyes flick back to mine, and the gesture spreads a smile on my face.

"This is where I came to escape," he tells me. "After my mum passed away, and my dad was struggling, and I had no certainty left, I came here." He wanders back over to me, takes my right hand. "Can I tell you another thing?"

I nod.

He smiles. "If you look closely at the lanterns, you can see writing on them."

So I step forward, looking up, seeing them all at once.

Harry reaches up and plucks one lantern down to remove the sheet of laminated scarlet paper around the fairy light.

Fairy lights.

"Each time I came here," Harry explains, "I wrote the reason down on a piece of paper, laminated it, poked a hole in it, then attached it to the tree."

I'm staring at him, at his lips that are talking, hearing everything that comes out of his mouth a few moments after he says them, like a delayed audio on an old DVD movie.

"Actually, I'll be honest, Tasmin. I made all these lanterns last night." He grins at me, and his smile seems to expand each passing second. "I bought these fairy lights, and then I put them together and–"

I hate to break such a long and impressive smile streak for him, but I fail to restrain myself any longer.

One moment, I'm admiring all of him from far away, and then I'm in his arms once more, and our lips are moving over each other, and there's no such thing as the word 'gentle' anymore.

There's fairy lights over us like that night when Harry's lips were so close to mine. And my heart felt like it'd burst, then, one by one, each individual fairy light would burst in an explosion of colour too, as quick as the beats of my heart.

My dad'll expect an explanation later, because through the canopy, the sky dims. I watch shadows in the shape of trees and leaves tip-toe over the grass, settle over us, then fade as more darkness settles in.

But we glow in the circle of multicoloured lights that glimmer over us in our own canopy. I'd say that Harry's smile is the brightest one of all. He'd say otherwise, but I know it's true.

Harry sighs. I sigh. I feel his eyes on me, and I grin, because I want him to see me smile. I wanna see his too.

"Tasmin."

"Yes?"

"Can I tell you one more thing before we leave?"

I sit up. "Do we have to leave yet?" Warm hand on my cheek, caressing gently… almost sadly.

"Can I tell you?" he presses on, his voice calm but firm.

I nod, and his hand doesn't leave my cheek.

"Remember how I told you that this place was my escape?" he asks, and for a reason I don't even know of yet, my smile begins to fade.

I just nod.

He smiles, and I watch his green eyes flit from my eyes to my nose to my lips to my cheek… all of me.

"I wanna give it all to you."

Before he can say anything else, I shuffle forward and our knees are pressed together. Closer now, and I can see the light in his eyes fading. I will it back with my mind and my words.

"Harry, like you said, it's ours now, isn't it?"

That makes him beam, but only for a moment.

"Isn't it?" There's a plea in my voice, and I despise it.

He isn't smiling now. "Tasmin, my dad still wants to go back to London." I don't say anything, but inside, I wince. "Also…" He pauses painfully long. "I'm telling the court about the Reprisal."

My eyes widen without me meaning them to. "You mean, the organisation you and Ally were a part of?"

He nods.

"Why? Doesn't that mean that they'll find out you were–"

"They will."

"But, Harry, you can't–"

Both hands on my cheeks now, holding so firmly.

"Revenge is wrong. I know that now, and although I can't do much to fix the mistakes I made, I can do a few things." He kisses me. "Like this." He kisses me again. "Like telling the truth."

I'm choking back my cries, but I let them run when Harry pulls me into him. He's so warm.

"I'll still be around," he whispers, his voice steady now. "Promise me you'll keep our haven safe."

I can't do much more than nod, but in my head, all I can see are his green eyes and this tree and our fairy lights in our secret haven.

I don't know how long he'll be gone. But I've kept our promise with the hope that we'll meet again someday.