Another crazy bitch

Past life, current life, combined 70 years.

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During that time, in the school, army, workplace combined I have seen many a lunatic, and since arriving at the organisation I have encountered many more with multiple screws loose and I thought I'd seen them all.

But now I realised how little I actually knew. Even if this wasn't designed to kill, it's still a magic bombardment.

In the last Great War, this was the technique that made all the kingdoms realise just who was in charge.

Wait, to begin, wasn't this meant as a skill for massacre, as in get hit and you're screwed.

And that kid is dodging it. So naturally, as if he's dancing.

If dodging this was possible, all the countries' strategists and elite families' specialists wouldn't be clutching their heads to find a solution.

But I can understand that much. But what he was doing, walking through that insane barrage with beautiful dance-like steps was picking mushrooms.

Not caring one bit about the others looking stupidly at him, he was happily humming away as he pulled out his dagger and diligently harvested mushrooms into his pockets.

Wait, aren't those shock shrooms?

They do have an official name, but the mushrooms that are usually called Shock Shrooms, are poisonous mushrooms that when eaten, your body would tingle like you've been electrocuted, followed by paralysis with a high chance of death by cardiac arrest.

It was a poisonous mushroom that even four year olds knew about, but he's collecting them while smiling?

Is he trying to kill by slipping them into my food? Let's avoid food with mushrooms for the next few weeks.

Rumours say that it tastes like you could see heaven, but since the possibility of getting a one-way ticket to heaven is higher, there are no morons that would actually eat it.

Let's sneak a peek at his files.

Huh, No. 1000.

The one deemed least talented out of all the trainees.

The majority of the detailed reports said no talent with the sword, lazy, vacant stares into space and so on.

There aren't any good appraisals. Then let me add a line.

-Crazy b*tch. Handle with caution.

Looking back, this appraisal is similar to the only girl of the crew from last year.

Although she's a genius that worked her way to the position of deputy director of the Intelligence corps, she was a crazy b*tch even looking at her objectively.

The way she looked at me in particular resembled a viper waiting for prey to the extent that I had to live as if waiting to be ambushed at any moment.

There actually were two cases where she invaded my bedroom.

"Can you bring that child over?"

"Yes, sir."

Note the current danger level as 'high.'

But since nothing's for sure, I thought that I should see him from up close before making a decision, but the exact moment I tell the communications magician beside me, No. 1000 turns to me instantly.

Magic is awesome! Who needs cellphones! But I can't use it!

Suppressing my tiny bit of despair and envy, I face the person in front of me.

She's small. Her hair is short, but I think it's almost definitely a girl.

Unlike the other trainees, she had two more daggers on her belt, one on either side, and her pockets that I used to call a biscuit pouch in my past life, were currently filled with freshly harvested Shock Shrooms.

"Did you call for me?"

A slightly dull voice. +1 danger level.

"Why do you have those mushrooms."

"Ah…"

For a moment she was lost for words and looked at me warily. +1 danger again.

"W, would you like to try them?"

With a shaking hand she took out a mushroom from her pocket and offered it to me.

Mm. No. Do I look like I've lost it?

I don't want to die yet.

"I'm alright."

"It, it's tasty."

Contrary to her words, she put the mushroom back in her pocket with a relieved expression.

She really did pick those to eat…

Yep. Danger -20.

But if the enemy, no, some reincarnated kind-hearted hero was her enemy, she would most likely turn coat if she was baited with food, so raise the danger level back again. I'll just leave the final danger evaluation as 'high.'

"Eat these while you wait."

"Thank you very much!"

Wow, look at this kid.

Just a few strips of jerky and her voice hits the high octaves.

For a complete evaluation I immediately added another line to her notes.

-If she is not fed she has a high risk of sticking her knife in one's back, so at the very least feed her well no matter what.

"No way!"

As I diligently recorded my trainee's evaluations as an instructor, the communications magician beside me gasped in horror again. What was it? Did the kids get hit by the shrapnel from the barrage? I thought as I turned my head.

"What the hell."

Another crazy bitch, no, this time a crazy bastard was added to the mix.