Rest

She just lays in my arms sobbing, so hard and uncontrollably, I don't know what to do. I think she is even more hurt this time, than before. I do know she is holding me tight and not letting go. I grab my phone and call the sitter, knowing that she isn't able to take care of the babies. She is in no state to do anything. I tell the sitter she will be needed all day, as I hold Alexa in my arms.

"We will be needing you for the day and maybe even the night. I am sorry to be short notice but something came up." Ichiru says.

"No problem. I will be right over." The babysitter answers.

"Thank you, the door will be open, and I will be leaving shortly after you arrive," Ichiru replies.

"Whatever you need." The babysitter responds.

I hang up, seeing Alexa still out of it, still in that damn white shirt. I grab a throw blanket, and wrap it around her, covering her body. I just wait to hear the door before I leave the house. It doesn't take long before the sitter gets here, I sit on the edge of the bed with Alexa in my arms rocking her back in forth, cradling her in my arms bridal style. Once I hear the door close, I get up, holding her walking down the stairs, to the door.

"Mr. Kiryu is everything ok?" The sitter asks.

When Alexa hears Mr. Kiryu, I see she grabs on to me even tighter. I share so much of him, we are the same in a lot of ways, I now know if I want her to survive this, I am going to have to use it to my advantage. It's not what I wanted but, it's what I need to do, to make her get through this.

"Yes, everything is fine, just take care of the kids." Ichiru answers.

I open the door and carry her down the street to my home, I feel it will be better there than in her home. Fewer memories to overtake her. That room was driving her insane, and I know it was my doing pushing her to go back into it. If she would have stayed away, this wouldn't have taken place.

I take her inside and up to my old bedroom. There are no memories there, as she has never been in here before. I sit her, on the bed, tears still streaming down her face, looking lost. That damn white shirt is still on her body. Still filling her with memories and his scent. I grab a pair of my jog pants and kneel to the floor in front of her, sliding the pants up and over her. She doesn't make a sound or stop me. It's like she is a doll, and I am dressing her. I go back to my drawer and pull out one of my tee shirts, I go over to her.

"Alexa I am going to now put this on you. I will not look I promise you. I just feel you would be better in this." Ichiru says.

I get no response as I unbutton the shirt button after button. She just closes her eyes, and tears fall down her face. She is so hurt, it's written all over her. How this hurts me to see this, damn you Zero, you took even more of her, if that was even possible. I remove the white shirt throwing it in the hamper as I slide my tee-shirt down her arms and on her chest.

"I think you need some rest, I will let you stay here. I will give you some time alone."

As I try to walk away she grabs my hand, looking up at me, filled with tears. She pats the bed next to her and I know she wants me to stay. I walk back over to her, and she just wraps her arms around me. She may be crying over him, but it seems she still needs me. I see that as a good sign and accept it. I wrap my arms around her tightly, letting her know I am here. She just snuggles her head in my chest.

I stay there until she falls asleep, I then put her body down onto the bed and cover her. She needs rest, her mind needs rest. Its been a long night and day. From how it looks it seems he just confused her more. But I really can't tell since she hasn't said a word.

I walk downstairs and call the old man, giving him the update that he wanted.

"Did she stay?" The old man asks.

"Yea, only because I pushed her back. It Seems I was strong enough to do that. I don't think he fought me on it, or she wouldn't be here."

"That's great that you did. That means your love for her is strong." The old man states.

"What good is it, if she wants him? She is destroyed by all this. She won't stop crying, he hurt her so badly. How can he say he loves her and he does this to her? Why come back even in a dream to only make her want him more? He states he wants me to be with her, then screws up anything I build! She was doing a lot better and now I don't know."

"I know you want to put all the blame on your brother, but it was her as well. She wasn't doing as good as you thought, she wanted to contact him again. I know you really want this Ichiru but it's not going to happen overnight. Your stepping into his terrority, if you think he was good or bad for her. She was his wife. I am also sorry to say but you looking like him, sounding like him, must drive her crazy at times. You know there is a chance she will be with you at the start because of it. Or it may even push her away. She is confused and hurt deeply. " The old man says.

"What do you want me to do? I can't help how I look or sound. I can't change it. If I stay away, she will think I gave up on her. She needs me more now than ever. This whole thing has been a curse. We all fell for people we can't have fully, it seems to just go back n forth. My brother with Yuki, Alexa with my brother and now me with her. "

"In the Manga, your brother did get Yuki, it wasn't exactly fully but he did get to spend his life with her and even have a child. She never let go of Kaname when he died, but your brother was big enough to let that go. Loving her so much it didn't matter. You're going to have to do the same. When Kaname died, Yuki was a mess, it took her a long time for her to let Zero back in, he stuck it out, and got what he wanted." The old man explains.

"That may be true but we don't have 1,000 years to play games here. I do see what you're saying and I understand it. It just bothers me."

"At least she is here and you can work on it. She will get over this as well. It's a lot for one person to deal with, her mind, body, and soul need to heal." The old man admits.

"I know, I'm going to make something to eat and try to keep her here at my parent's house for a bit. I think the rest will do her good."

"That's good thinking. If you need anything else just let me know." The old man says.