Chapter Eighty seven

I watched the white ceiling, I kept my eyes fixed on the design till I feel nothing and the only thing that comes to my mind was the design. Yeah the design, I let my mind played on all the designs that I have done with Mandy those that I remember though. I remember the new building at the site, the first outdoor job I was excited to show out my work and it was beautiful and the first person I had shared my joy with was Mandy and my baby.

I often talk to her a lot when I was still pregnant with her, I thought it was kind of cute. Every thought seem to be a reminder of my Sunny, I closed my eyes trying to find the tears but they slipped out unwilling. 

"Becca, Emily who has been with me for sometimes call out, yeah she has been talking to me but I wasn't listening. I tried to think to know if I would know any of what she said, maybe I love you a word or it was going to be okay. Funny I thought

" Becca" She called out again reaching for my hand. I turn to stare at her "I wanted to ask her about her baby, how was she feeling but I just felt numb Sunny wasn't here again it was so hard to believe that I lost the case something Unbelievable " Becca, she called again. I stare at her teary eyes "I know this is very hard for you to take in, I know how you're feeling now but please you have to stay strong for us and Sunny, we love you so much and Lawyer has given you permission to visit your daughter two times each month" She smiled with the tears in her eyes. 

I shut my eyes, I didn't want to see any of them I just want to be left alone my Sunny, no, it can't be true maybe they were all lying. "Sunny, I called out " Mummy want to see you" the pain was too much to bear it was suffocating, I couldn't hold back my tears anymore I let it all slide out. Facing away from Emily I sob till my sides hurt badly. Emily was comforting me all the while.

"Andrew, I turned to Emily. " I want to see Andrew". "Ummm, yeah sure I'll take you to him" I shook my head, I know he was afraid that I'll run off truthfully part of me wanted that, I wanted to run far away from here to meet my daughter no matter what they say I know I'll get my daughter back it wasn't possible that my daughter was away from me. "I'm going to see Andrew" She stared at me for a while  "You'll find him down the clinic" 

I nodded and scrambled out of the bed when I walk down through the corridor with dozens of eyes watching me stare at me getting ready to catch me if I attempted to do anything scary but I was exhausted of any of that all I wanted is my daughter.

I felt empty, I felt as if my heart has been torn open Sunny was supposed to be here to be with me, it just shouldn't have happened this way. I stumble strengthening myself I continue down the hall, I sighted Andrew where he was being attended by the nurse. The wound seems deep, I have been out of my mind, I couldn't bear to walk toward him it gurt seeing him in pain, flinching as the nurse attends to different cut. 

Then he looked up "Becca, are you alright? Did you need anything? I tried to smile that I was okay but my face feels numb, I pushed my feet to walk toward him. I sat next to him and watched the nurse put the final treatment to the wound before she walks off saying encouraging words to Andrew. "Becca, Andrew reached for my hand, I stare down at it for a while still I feel empty.

" I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for hurting you". "It's okay, I'm being treated now so it's no big deal"  I nodded and turned away from him, I have apologized now there was nothing left for me I watched the passing nurses and patients I wonder if any of them has felt the pain I was experiencing now.

"Becca, we go still fight to take Sunny back all we have to do is to go back to the Judge, theirs's always a way to do it" I nodded and turned away again, I missed her laughter, the smile I'll pay anything to hear her again. My sweet daughter tears dropped down from my eyes  "I need to see my daughter" I muttered more to myself "I want to hold her in my arms, she doesn't like him and I wonder how she was coping" what if she was crying now. 

"No, no, baby, mummy is coming for you" I turned back to Andrew his eyes were filled with tears now. "I want to see my daughter, I can't take being away from her, I can't survive. " Becca, look I'm sure Sunny is okay for now when you get well enough we'll go and see her".  "I'm totally fine" I looked down the hall that lead to the exit, I want to be out of here, my daughter would probably be crying now.

"I promise you when you get better". " we'll see here". "You promised! You promise that nothing would go wrong, you said that ... That I'll win the case and then everything would be fine now where is my Sunny, my baby can you Imagine giving birth to your child and taking care of her and then another Individual have my baby later". I watched him, I was losing it every minute knowing that Sunny. 

The pain came back, I crouched my chest tightly and bang my head on the wall " I want my baby". "Stop it, Becca, Please". Andrew moved to hold me in his arms. " I have nothing else". "You still have Sunny, me, Emily, your mum, aunt and even Mandy" he knows better than to mention my father "you still have s a lot of people you cared about you" "it still didn't.... Forger it" I pushed him away from me and scrambled up "remember we're always here for you". I didn't turn, those words feel empty, I feel super alone.

" You have to eat to regain some weight," Mum said soothing my hand. "You know you were gone for a week" Aunt filled in. "That's why you need to eat to get well". I didn't look or respond to them. " you know Emily was very excited the day her baby kicked and moved, it was so cute".Mum was trying to get me to speak but I didn't feel like it, I just want to be left alone every minute It seems as if I'm losing consciousness but still I'm awake.