1_Lucius the entertainer

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"Hello everybody we are MusicLover and today we are going to talk about the new MV of our favorite idol also known as Music emperor Lucius. Like always are his MV spectacu-"

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"-ma of our film emperor Lucius. Everybody is waiting for it, and it will come out in an hour. We can't wai-"

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"-zing, our number one entertainer, Lucius, tickets got sold within 5 minutes. If it were not because of the freezing it would sell out faster. Our Sunshine is really amaz-

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"-ted boyfriend in 2035 is...Lucius. Congratulations! He is the most wanted boyfriend for 5 years straight. He is really our pri-"

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A man of the age of 25 looked at the tv screen in front of him that is now black. He smiled alone with nobody around. The reason why he smiled, unknown. But what you do know is that the person who is smiling name Lucius is, the Lucius that everyone is talking about the one and only.

Lucius is a well-known idol who can compose. He is good at singing and dancing. He can even rap, he's just that amazing. But he's not only an idol he's also known as an actor and I'm not lying when I'm saying that he is a born actor. Don't forget his looks, everyone who sees him thinks that they saw a God, a fairy even a demon his looks are out of this world.

How he looks like you ask? He has black hair like obsidian and deep blue eyes that resembles the dark blue sky in the night. His skin is as white as milk. It looks like he never goes outside but that's of course not true. His body is slender with hidden muscles that you won't expect. He's just amazingly handsome.

His name Lucius doesn't fit with his looks. Do you know why? Because his name means light, but he has black hair like obsidian and deep blue eyes like the dark sky.

If you didn't know who he was you would think he was a cold person who doesn't give a damn about you, the world just everything. He looks like a God that just looks around but doesn't do anything to help you or someone else. Like a God that is too lazy to help the people and just wants to lay down and do nothing. But he has this aura where you would want to avoid him, but it stills attract you and you want to get closer to him. That's the first impression people would have if they met him without knowing who he is.

That is why his name just doesn't fit if you forget his personality then. His personality is bright and nice. He's a gentleman and everyone's dream boyfriend. A boy or a girl, young or old, it doesn't matter they all love him. If you compare his name with his personality, it totally fits him. He is their Sunshine and their hope, their pride, and their light, he is everything they want him to be. They all love him, maybe not everyone because nobody will like the same thing, but we can say for 1000% sure that nobody hates or dislikes him. If they needed to choose between hate and love they would definitely choose love. That's how much they love and like him.

You can say that his looks and personality are the opposite of each other. But maybe that is one of his charms.

But does he love himself?

Nobody can answer this question. Only Lucius can give you an answer to this question. A lot of people would think that he likes himself because he has it all. He has everything you would ever like to have, fame, money, love, and more. But does he really have it all?

Right now, Lucius is thinking about this question:[Do I love myself?]

He asks himself but he got no answer to reply to this question.

[I achieved everything I ever wanted. I became a person nobody will ever forget. I'm the top entertainer, from music to acting. I did everything but still, why am I not happy?]

He has this thought even though he knows the answer. The answer: [I lost too much to reach this place and I'm not sure that it was worth it.]

When he thinks this, he always thinks about the past. He had a lot of girlfriends even boyfriends. They all came to him saying how much they liked him and wanted to be together for the rest of their lives. They always say sweet things like: "I will only love you." or "I will never leave you." You get it right? They say this and that but, in the end, they always leave him. Even if he tried to make them stay, they will always leave him.

He never truly liked one of them but he just needed someone who would stay by his side but that was too hard for a wish. He hated it because they would all say things like never leaving but in the end, they all left.

[I will always be on my own.]

It really is depressing to have this thought, but he couldn't help but have it. It is not something easy to stop, right?

Let's not forget the way they would leave. They all ended by saying: "I really do love you, but I think it is better to stay as a fan. I think it would be better for both of us." Lucius's relationships always end with this phrase. It frustrates him but what can he do. Nothing. Nothing at all. Once someone even asked him: "Do you even love me?" But Lucius didn't love that person so he couldn't answer yes but he didn't want to say no, so he stayed silent. The person stood up and left while saying: "I see." He didn't know what to do so he stared and let him go. So, in the end, they all left, and he let them leave. He doesn't know when, but he stopped going out with someone because it's tiring, and he didn't have the extra energy for it.

So, in the end, he never found his other half but it's fine because

[Nobody would want a boyfriend like me but maybe, just maybe someone does love me. Not as his or her idol but as a person.]

He smiled. It wasn't a smile from his heart but a mocking smile. Because who would love him with a heart like this that only beats and cannot feel any emotion.

[Who was I kidding.]

[Would someone love me if I truly like myself? Would someone understand me? Will someone ever love me for who I truly am? Would I ever know who I even am?]

A lot of questions but no answers.

A lot of people say that the beginning of loving begins with loving yourself so...

[Do I love myself?]

A hard question. Not only for Lucius but for everyone. Can each of us love ourselves 100%? Hard question. Cause everyone has a side or something they don't or want to show to someone else. Another question: Does someone like that even exist?