Michelle POV
--
When I turned to face him so that I could pass him the syllabus, he was ready to receive it. Our eyes met and I thought my heart would lurch out of my ribcage. I did not have enough sense to even school my facial expression, so I don't know what I looked like and how he saw me.
Still, politely, he smiled and said, "Thank you." And I thought my soul just went to heaven.
Did I come back to this time just so that I can meet him again? Was I sent here so that I can save him from the time of his death? Gosh, I'm just crushing over a dead man, and well, maybe I died in that elevator too. Who knows?
Oh, Michelle, don't get ahead of yourself. You just saw your real future husband awhile ago and now you're already here going gaga over another man.
Anyway, before I could even say 'you're welcome' he already turned away from me. Maybe he thought I was weird? Or maybe I did not make any lasting impression on him? Why am I even placing so much meaning behind that? Maybe he's just being a normal teenager. Duh!
Still, even though I knew I should be 31, my heart felt like that of a teenage girl. I was even finding teenage boys attractive. Was it because I am back to this body despite my older mentality?
The professor started talking about the syllabus and what we need to prepare for the next meeting. All that time, I have been peeking glances at Anthony. Will I be able not to make a babbling fool of myself if I talk to him now? I recall that we only got to talk 3 times in our lives and all those only in the parameters of this classroom because of some class activity.
In the past, I am positive that he knew my name at the very least or can recognize my face because during my other years in this university, although we never got to become classmates again, we did pass by each other occasionally. Of course, some chance encounter I actually set-up myself just so that I can see him smile at me and say hi.
Though that's all there was ever to it. I would stalk him from afar, then when I feel like I look my best, I would pretend that we're having a chance encounter and pass by each other. Yes, I was desperate but too shy to tell him what I felt. Janina was usually with me when I did that. I will ask her to stay put in a certain location so she can spy at Anthony's expression after our 'chance' encounter.
Anyway, moving back to the present, I tried to listen to the announcements our professor was making. "Next meeting, we will have a short quiz. No need to review as it will be a reading comprehension…"
After that announcement, the class was dismissed early. Anthony started placing the syllabus in his bag. Should I talk to him now?
I swallowed. Am I ready for this? Can I do this? A part of me should be guilty as I'm already married but please, I'm not some Holy Mary, mother of God, so my heart could still beat for someone other than my husband. Plus, it's not like we're married in this timeline already, and he was even having the time of his life with Lara for now.
Perhaps, I have been staring at Anthony so intently as I tried to decipher my next move that he noticed.
"I'm sorry, is there anything I can help you with?" Anthony asked.
Of all the things I have been thinking and planning to say to him, the instant our eyes met, my mind just blanked. It was like I was really my 18-year-old self again and I can't get the words out.
Perhaps seeing that I did not answer, and my face was turning red, he looked at me in concern. "Are you alright? Should I help you to the clinic?"
Seeing his concerned face, I can only shake my head. What was wrong with me? Trying to control myself, I took a deep breath and gave him a small smile.
"Sorry, I just sometimes have a hard time breathing. Thank you for your concern." Alright, that was an outright lie, but how could I tell him that every time I saw him, and I mean for a number of years, he literally took my breath away?
"Are you, by chance, asthmatic? Not to pry. But my cousin also has the same symptom. I am Anthony Ren by the way." He introduced.
I almost wanted to cry tears of joy… he just introduced himself to me and I think this is the longest conversation we had to date.
"I… I am Michelle Lui. Uh, no… no, I'm not, at least I think I'm not." I replied sounding so stupid. Then again, how could I sound more intelligent when my heart kept on doing summersaults?
Anthony chuckled. "That's good, but maybe you should get it checked out sometime, just in case. Anyway, I'm off. It was nice to meet you, seatmate."
Before I could think of anything to say in response, he was already leaving. Thank god, I don't want him to see my starstruck face I'm sure I am now making.
When he was already out of sight, I was finally able to normalize my breathing.
As I gathered my things to leave the classroom, all I could think of was how cool Anthony was.
Anyway, in my mind, I could only apologize to my future husband. 'I'm so sorry Steve, but please don't blame me. You're still the one I love. I did not go out of my way to meet Anthony because we were to share this class in the first place. While I did go out of my way to see you, not that your younger self appreciated it.'
--
TBC