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This Isn't Canon! (Or that time I reincarnated into an AU-Naruto)

When one reincarnates into the protagonist there are often two reactions. Glee or overwhelming terror. For her? There was not one shred of fear. After all, of all the Shonen protagonists, there was one above all that could so easily become broken in their setting with just a little effort. Sadly, it appears as if that Golden Thing that she had surprised had already thought of that, and so much more...

BalancedSelfInsert · Anime e quadrinhos
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109 Chs

Where's my popcorn?

Legs dangling off the tree branch, Naruko's head in her palm as she watched the battle below.

"Water Style: Stormy Blockade" Her Ninjutsu clone slapped her hands on the ground causing water to rush out of the pool and towards her Kunai clone. 'Should really just call it Bukijutsu Clone.'

"First Step, Slashing Wind!" The Bukijutsu Clone in response seemed to move and flow around the water, cutting it when necessary to clear out a path.

A third clone, her Shunshin/Teleporting Clone at the moment of impact blitzed her Water Style clone, only for it to be spotted. "Water Style: Water Wall" Flipping through handseals that clone would again slap her hands on the ground forming the C-Rank version of Water Formation Wall.

The water just used for Stormy Blockade rose up once more, intercepting the kick that was going straight to its master's head. "Too slow, try again later!" 'Now I'm taunting myself, great.' Her fourth and final clone however just leaped up to the tree next to her main body. Herself? Fuck clones were confusing, and started whistling.

She let out a sigh. "What are you doing?" Her other self shrugged. "I could crush them all considering you let me use all of our abilities. They'd have to team up to stall me, so I'm just watching with you."

Naruko sighed. "Fine, whatever. At least go on a different tree so you get a different perspective then." 'Damn me, can't even listen to my own orders!' 

As her other clone flickered off to another tree she grumbled to herself for a few moments before saying out loud, "You know what I need? I need some popcorn."

Sadly popcorn didn't materialize in front of her, her ANBU guards were so cruel. Naruko watched the fight wage on, with her eyes tracking the fight with some ease at times, and a little bit of difficulty at others. She was faster and stronger by a fair amount compared to her clones, but there were 3 of them to keep track of, and it was the first time she was watching them spar. 'The fourth clone was correct though. I think I'll need to have all my clones be restricted in some way while fighting me, and then do another set of training where they're unrestricted fighting me. Once I get into some serious Taijutsu training from Dad's scroll, I could have 3 different Taijutsu clones as well, although that would expose Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu.' Thinking it over, she'd finally shrug. 'I'm a fucking Jinchuriki, just say I accidentally overpowered the regular one.'

"Oh, nice suicide attack clone!" Indeed, her Ninjutsu clone had apparently got pissed off at her Shunshin clone, and as such pumped all of her chakra into one big Water Style: Water Wave, which did exactly what was intended from an Uzumaki Jutsu, and flooded the entire training ground!

"I guess this means the Bukijutsu Clone wins?" A moment passed, "Never mind, I guess technically the 'Use Everything' clone wins, the Bukijutsu Clone is dead too." Freaking Bukijutsu Clone got pushed back into a tree branch at the last moment. "Note to self, Shadow Clones are really frail. That definitely wouldn't have killed me."

Dispelling her fourth clone and taking in its memories, she let out a hum. 'She got a few things I missed. This and watching my fellow students spar is actually quite useful. Particularly watching them spar. With how slow they are I can dissect it quite well.'

Formulating a future training plan she finally decided on, she herself practicing Shunshin/Teleporting, Clone 1 practicing Water Jutsu, Clone 2 practicing Bukijutsu, Clone 3 practicing Taijutsu, and Clone 4 goes to the academy and brings a leaf with her for Water Nature Transformation. 'That should be the best. When I can use a fifth clone for training she'll focus on Academy Taijutsu, and only when I get to the sixth clone will Fuinjutsu training be back on the table.'

Reforming her clones to get them to do the newly created training plan she thought back on her first day at the academy, what she learned, what she had seen, and what she had felt. 'It's full of Chunin, in fact, I think most of the Chunin that reside in Konoha are just at the academy or are on gate guard/patrol duty. I haven't actually sensed that many Chunin shinobi of the major clans now that I think about it as well. Mainly just those on the younger side.' 

Thinking it through like that, it's clear what could potentially be going on, as well as why she always had four ANBU guards on her. 'A war is brewing, or there's one happening in secret.' It was actually quite obvious in hindsight. Only ever seeing fresh Chunin or Teachers. The absurd mass of Jonin that seemed to be gathering in Konoha, that secret weapon of an ANBU showing up, Kakashi still donning the mask, and Itachi showing up inside of Konoha. 'So the question remains. Is this a hidden war that will say hidden? Something that happened because of the Kyuubi Attack, the Hyuga Incident, and the Uchiha Clan Genocide? Or is it something new, something that is unique to this Universe?'

She didn't know the answer, which for once worried her. After all, if it was something unique, it could turn into a full-blown war, which would ruin all of her plans. After all, she knew how Konoha treated its Jinchuriki during wartime. Kushina was essentially locked away, and Naruto was literally sent to an island turtle in the middle of nowhere. 'Whatever it is, must be in the very start of it. After all, I'm not stuck in a barrier 24/7.' 

Swinging her feet from the tree branch she'd open up her Mind's Eye of Kagura. 'Tenzo has been given a suspicious number of shifts for me. Same with my dad's guards. Any shift that doesn't have them seems to have that Coyote mask woman or a stronger in general ANBU squad. For example, that Captain Bird was definitely an Elite Jonin.' 

Starting to hum a song, she'd continue on that thought line. 'What would make it easier to tell if I had actual intel. But whenever I split off a Shadow Clone to explore the village, one of the ANBU does the same. I'd need to tap into K-chan's chakra in order to truly outnumber them in a meaningful manner at this point, and for obvious reasons that would be... bad.' With that thought through, it was obvious then that she wouldn't be able to covertly get intel. So, she'd do what she did best.

"Coyoteeeeeee!" A moment later the scary shouldn't exist woman herself was on the branch next to her.

"Yes?"

"Soooo, are we going to war?" The woman stared down at her for a few moments before saying,

"That's a question for the next time you meet Hokage-sama, not me." She then immediately disappeared.

"Thank you Coyote! That means yes, y'know."

With that knowledge, Naruko jumped off her branch, pumped some chakra into her weights, and started going through her shunshin training. "Kami damn it brat." She ignored the muttered cursing of Coyote, she was such a nice ANBU telling her such secret information. Maybe she should get her a fruit basket?

This took forever to make cause I kept getting distracted. It was meant to be out two hours ago. Whoops.

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