It's Free Real Estate

The sun had barely risen on this side of the Green Morgue, the sky was a mix of the black and blue of the night before and the yellow of dawn, but that didn't matter to me, as it was time to get on with my daily routine that I've been following for a few days now.

I put on my armor and strapped Laenae's crib to my body, grabbed my weapons and prepared to leave my hut...

"OUCH! ZOGDAM!"

Just to bang my head on the doorframe... Wait a minute! This never happened before! And, my armor felt tighter.

I left the shack and crossing the dirt road, I observed my reflection in the window of another shack. Who would know? My ork biology is working, because to my surprise I was getting bigger.

An ork Boy is approximately eight feet tall, if he doesn't fix his hunchback I was approximately eight feet and a bit more, about the size of a Nob. Well, the bigger the fight the bigger the growth and the fight against the boar sure wasn't easy.

However, it wasn't just my height that changed. Have you ever heard the joke that no one has ever seen a gorilla at its full strength because it doesn't know how to train? Well, what would happen if an ork trained?

The answer is in front of me. The armor was tightening my muscles, highlighting them and showing off every contour.

Defined abs with six-pack forming, giving the impression that it could take Bolter shots without problem. I finally lost my Bad Moon belly.

Broad, strong shoulders looking like they could carry tons.

Arms the size of tree trunks with muscles that flexed with every movement, looking like they could crush anything in front of me.

I also had a noticeable change in my face, my remaining eye glowed a brighter red next to my Gitfinda, my teeth were bigger, whiter and more pointed and my jaw was becoming perfectly defined.

I was one-step closer to becoming the Giga Ork.

 I got out of my posing session with the call of two Grots.

"Boss!"

Leaving one of the shacks next to mine, Dobby and Gulg ran towards me, using their equipment and Gulg carrying the ammo pack.

The Grots had changed as well, their lean physique was slowly disappearing and they started to gain some muscle, leaving behind their hunched posture, the bulging belly that the Grots displayed fading too.

"You two are awake. Excellent! Ready to go?" I said as I turned around and smiled at the two of them.

"Yes boss!" Both responded.

"So what are we waiting for? Let's go, you Gits!"

Wasting no time, we started our morning jog, leaving the outskirts of the city, passing through several districts and streets, on the way, we passed the bazaar and there I saw Grots setting up their stalls and preparing to sell their wares.

Nevertheless, these Grots stood out from the others, each of them was well equipped, wore a yellow shirt and carried a Slugga, after all these Grots worked for me.

Once the tents were set up, a small flag unfurled at the top, this flag showed the Bad Moon clan symbol and my name written underneath. I need to promote my brand somehow.

As we ran, we passed orks going about their daily business, merchants opening their shops, hunters going to the guild, guards going to the walls, everyone giving us strange looks or muttering insults as we passed.

An ork running for no reason and accompanied by two Grots is an unusual sight, but if someone has a problem, they will end up with a few teef less, unless they are a Nob or Warboss.

At the thought of facing a Nob or Warboss, I felt my heart racing and my blood rushing, slowly a smile formed on my face and I ran faster, almost jumping, suddenly the left side of my vision filled with static, my Gitfinda acting weird.

"Boss wait!" Dobby and Gulg yelled after me as they ran faster.

The static came and went, but between the flashes, I could see green energy covering the entire city and the orks. This has been going on for a while; I've determined this can only be one thing. The WWWAAAGGGHHH! Natural from all orks and source of their passive psychic power.

I started seeing the WWWAAAGGGHHH! After the fight with the boar, my near-death experience, and my encounter with Gork and Mork. I'm still not sure about the last part. Did I really meet the ork gods or was I just hallucinating?

Anyway, I've been trying to control the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Last time, I called a bunch of orks to my location. However, what else can I do? It's so strange, feeling a connection with every orkoid being I encounter.

We left the city and walked around it close to the walls, in the distance we saw orks racing their cars and motorbikes in a cacophony of screams, shots and laughter.

Again, my vision filled with static and I saw the green energy following the group of orks like a storm. I felt agitated, the WWWAAAGGGHHH! 

I tried to control myself again. I took a deep breath, suppressing the feelings, I felt a twinge of pain at that, but I also felt a little bit of joy.

I think I'll try to control the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Like a fight, and if there's one thing orks like, it's fighting. I am challenging myself here and intend to succeed. Maybe this will help me get bigger?

With our run over, we climbed to the walls in a secluded part and sat in lotus position, the Grots on either side.

"Hey boss. Why are we here?" Dobby asked me.

"To learn how to use the WWWAAAGGGHHH!" I replied while watching the horizon.

"The WWWAAAGGGHHH! Like the war cry?" Gulg asked. Confused.

Their lack of information does not surprise me. Orks are not aware of their powers and Grots even less.

"No, forget what I said. However, I have a question for you. What do you two want?"

"What do you mean, boss?" Gulg asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Allow me to elaborate. We all like fighting, don't we?"

"Yes, boss." Dobby replied, nodding.

"But why do we fight?"

"Because it's fun?" Gulg asked hesitantly.

"Yes. And what else?"

"Because did Gork and Mork told us to?" Dobby asked this time.

"Probably. But have you ever stopped to think that life is not just going from fight to fight?"

"And is there anything more than fighting, boss?" Dobby asked again.

"You can bet. I like fights like any other ork, but I want more. Dobby, Gulg, besides Laenae, fighting and the two of you, what's my other favorite thing? You must have noticed."

"Teef?" Both Grots responded with obvious doubt on their faces.

"Yes. Teeth or teef. Call it what you want. I love teef like any other Bad Moon. Moreover, I want more. Not just to buy food, but the best food. I want the best weapons, the best cars, the best house, I just want the best, but for that I need a lot of teef and I have plans to get them. In the end, to be able to live a comfortable life and be able to fight without worry. And you? What do you want?"

The Grots stared at me for a few seconds, constantly changing expressions while in deep thought. Then they looked to the ground, and stayed there in silence.

I'll let them think about what I said, in the meantime, let's get back to what I was doing. I tried to empty my mind, painfully pushing away any violent thoughts.

Calm down and focus.

This is a hard thing to do as every time I tried to completely calm down it felt like someone had driven a nail into my brain, orks were naturally violent and going against their nature just felt wrong.

Come on! Think! What do you know about the WWWAAAGGGHHH!

WWWAAAGGGHHH! It's the passive psychic power field generated by all orks, it helps orks recognize who's boss, and it manipulates reality, making ork technology work. In addition, one of the ways that the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Works is through emotions.

However, which emotions? Good emotions? Bad? Strong? I think there's only one way to find out. I concentrated and tried to remember some memory that was important to me, something that made me feel emotions stronger than usual.

Moreover, I ended up remembering. My family. I remembered all the times we spent together, the family vacations, birthdays, Christmases, the holidays. I felt something bubbling up inside me, a strange feeling, like electricity was coursing through my blood, but strangely, it wasn't a bad thing.

Suddenly this electricity raced up to my brain, my vision covered in static and when it returned, I could see the green energy again. One of those waves of green energy passed in front of my face.

I raised my hand towards the energy and watched as it passed through my fingers, like water. I had a little laugh at that, it felt good, it brought me a little joy.

I held the memory in my head and scanned the surrounding area for more traces of the WWWAAAGGGHHH! 

Nevertheless, as I did, I realized that something else was going on. Small objects I was carrying floated and green energy surrounded me in a spiral.

"Boss!"

Looking to the side, I saw Dobby and Gulg floating too. The Grots gave me startled looks as they clung to their equipment to stop it from flying away.

"Boss, are you a Weirdboy?" Dobby asked in surprise.

"I'm not sure, Dobby, but if I'm not, I'm close to being one." I responded, noting the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Flow around me. Green waves rose and fell, swirled and curved, going back and forth. Similar to sea waves. Maybe I can control it?

Keeping the emotions, I felt, I tried to give form to that energy. It might have been ork instinct talking, but I felt it would be right to move that energy into my hands.

Breaking the spiral that formed around me, energy circled my hands in the form of a green swirl that enveloped each fist. I felt stronger, I felt like I could punch a hole in a tank.

Deciding to try it, I stood up, clenched my right fist, pulled my arm back, and thrust it forward shortly thereafter. Halfway there, green lightning enveloped my right hand, rising to my elbow with a crackling noise.

With a noise similar to thunder on a stormy night, my punch ripped through the air in a flash of green energy and as it stopped, a rumble followed by a powerful shock wave echoed off the top of the walls.

Hard enough for me to feel a fierce gale on my face and for Dobby and Gulg to nearly be blown off the walls.

"Hahaha! Impressive! So that's the power of the WWWAAAGGGHHH? What else can I do..." I immediately cut my speech short as I felt my emotions explode, a pain surged through my stomach, making me clutch it in pain.

I felt a burn rising up my throat and into my mouth; I put my hand over my mouth, trying to stop whatever it was trying to get out of it from escaping.

The pain became stronger until I couldn't hold it any longer, then...

"BUURRPPHH!" A loud burp came out of my mouth, but what came next overcame the embarrassment I felt. A spewing of green flames came out of my mouth, boiling the air and going a few feet beyond the wall.

I was silent for a few seconds, processing what had just happened.

"Hahaha! Seriously? I wish my parents were here to see this!" I laughed for some time until I realized what I said.

My parents. They must be worried about me. How long have I been gone, exactly? I disappeared out of nowhere. Even living my own life, I kept in touch with them. They must think that it's weird that I suddenly got silent. And when they decide to call the police or something, they won't find anything.

And my friends? And the people at work? Will they miss me? They shouldn't think anything wrong if I don't show up for a day or two. But then what?

Slowly I felt the emotions going away, replaced by sadness. The energy slowly disappeared from my fists and around me; Dobby and Gulg stopped floating and fell softly to the ground.

Damn it! I haven't really thought about it. And the people back home? What are they thinking right now?

"Boss, are you ok?" Dobby asked. Worried as he approached with Gulg.

"Yes, Dobby... Don't worry... I just need some time to think." I replied as I pinched the bridge of my nose, and then watched the sunrise with my arms crossed.

"Aga! Agaga!"

I snapped out of my thoughts by a familiar voice coming from the crib. Holding it in front of my face, I opened it to reveal Laenae waking up. The baby let out a long yawn before rubbing her face and opening her eyes.

Laenae looked around before her eyes focused on me, seeing me, the baby let out a series of giggles as she smiled. Laenae reached her small hands towards me; I brought her close to my face, letting her touch my flat nose.

"Good morning, Laenae! Did you sleep well?"

"Baba!" Laenae replied as she clapped her hands on my face and smiled.

"I'll take that as a yes. But I'm not the only one here. How about you say hi to Dobby and Gulg?" I said as I turned her towards the Grots.

The Grots approached Laenae, smiling and waving at her.

"PPPSSSHHH!" However, Laenae's response was to stick her tongue out at the Grots and laugh right away. Dobby and Gulg walked away, saddened by the gesture.

"Hey, that wasn't nice." I pretended to scold Laenae, but the Eldar just laughed back.

Well, I may have left them all behind, but that doesn't mean I don't have anything worth fighting for here.

-XXXXXX-

We return to our home, but not before making a short stop at Grogak's canteen and getting more Squig milk for Laenae.

"Dobby, Gulg, call all our Grots who aren't looting the dead orks and selling equipment." I told both of them as soon as we got to our shack.

"Yes boss!" They both responded before running off to do my bidding.

With that done, I went into the shack and grabbed what I came for. The first was a series of wooden crates containing all the teefs I'd saved so far, it was time to use them for something.

The second item was a metal plaque that I hung around my neck; I had ranked up in the guild after killing the boar, even though I didn't do it alone.

The third item was a new piece of equipment made from boar parts. A long purple cloak with a hood. Covered in purple fur and spikes from the boar's back. The edges of the cloak were made of metal so I could adjust it without piercing my hands.

Hunchback! The day I got the mantle was interesting.

-XXXXXX-

"YYYEEEEAAAHHH!" All the orks within the guild screamed as they raised their mugs filled with fungus beer.

The tables occupied with groups of orks eating, drinking, shouting and fighting. Meanwhile I was near the counter with Dobby and Gulg by my side, waiting for Nozbad to return with my reward.

A while later the well-dressed ork appeared, carrying a bag of teef and a metal plaque with a chain. He placed the two on top of the counter.

Counting the teefs, I confirmed that they were in the promised quantity. However, the metal plaque confused me.

"Hey Nozbad! What is this thing for?" I asked the ork as I held the plaque in front of my face.

"'Dat's yer new hunta plaque. Kongratulations ya dumb git! Ya ranked up! Ya survived longa dan 'da otha rookies, which iz a surprise!" Nozbad said sarcastically while clapping his hands.

If he wasn't the guild attendant and bigger than I was. I would have punched him in the face. I had to take a deep breath to calm the ork rage.

"Seriously? What do I get from that?"

"Otha dan da respect uv gits smalla dan yer? Not a lot." Nozbad shrugged.

"I imagined." I said with a sigh, hanging the plaque around my neck, and keeping my old plaque in my pocket.

"Anyway, are ya sure ya're only gunna take nid's scalp? Ya kould have taken more." Nozbad said as he pointed to the Nid's yards of skin beside me.

I took a quick look at the pile of fur and spikes on the ground. I admit I could have asked for more, but I don't think the other orks who participated in the fight would have liked it. Besides, having the head of the Nid I killed displayed on the guild wall is good enough for my ego.

I thought as I looked at the head in question. The great head of the boar Nid hung just above the guild entrance door. Displayed to everyone and just below the head, a plaque with the following written in ork glyphs.

"Killed by Gorlonik Teef Rippa."

"Yes, I'm sure, now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take these parts to Maground. Time to get a new piece of equipment." I replied to Nozbad.

"Hunchback! If dat's wot ya want." Nozbad shrugged.

How do I take this skin without piercing my hands?

-XXXXXX-

I left Maground's workshop, carrying my new cloak, with Dobby and Gulg following me. Well, all that pain was worth it. I thought as I looked down at my hands full of freshly closed wounds and bloodstains.

"So, what do you think of my new cloak?" I asked the Grots as I put on my cloak and hood.

"Boss? Where did you go?" Dobby asked as he looked around.

"Hey Dobby, where's the boss? I hear his voice, but I don't see him!" Gulg spoke while nudging Dobby's shoulder.

Oh! That's right! I'm covered in purple from head to toe. I lowered my hood as I called out to the Grots.

"I am here."

"Boss!" The Grots screamed as they ran towards me.

"As I was saying..." I didn't get to finish my speech, because my Gitfinda locked its sights on something approaching.

Amidst the various icons, numbers and letters that formed in my vision, two red circles appeared and closed around the body contour of two approaching Nobs, highlighting them in the crowd in a shade of red.

The Nobs were three meters tall each; they wore armor from head to toe, a mixture of shiny metal and Nids parts. They carried Twin Link Shootas, Big Choppas resembling huge axes, and each had a Power Klaw.

They just walked towards me, didn't seem to be looking for a fight, but when it came to orks, that was hardly the case. The two Nobs stopped in front of me.

"Are ya 'da Gorlonik git?" The Nob on the left asked.

"Yes?" I said hesitantly, ready run away.

"Chief Rukzod wants ta speak wit' yer. Only ya." The Nob on the right said, glaring at Dobby and Gulg, making the two Grots back away.

This must be about the convoy that never arrived and the cargo Rukzod wanted so badly. Tales of my deeds must have reached the clan chief and probably exaggerated by the other orks.

"Right. I'll go with you, but I need a minute to talk to my Grots."

"Don't make us wait!" The Nob on the right growled.

With a nod of confirmation, I took Laenae's crib and crouched down in front of Dobby and Gulg.

"You two, I have an important mission for you. I don't know what will happen to me, but I'm going to a dangerous place, I want you to take care of our special Grot until I get back. Did you understand?" I said seriously to both Grots.

The Grots' nervousness disappeared, giving way to a serious and determined face.

"Yes boss!" They responded simultaneously, straightening their backs and puffing out their chests.

"I want you to call every Grot we have at our disposal. I want everyone to leave work early today and stand guard at our house, weapons ready and eyes open. Did you understand?"

"Yes boss!"

"Perfect! I'm counting on you!" I gave Laenae's crib to both Grots. Each holding one side of the crib with one hand and a Slugga in the other.

With a wave between us, the Grots took off running.

"Let's go." I said to the Nobs.

-XXXXXX-

I was inside the boss' fortress. In addition, this place was intimidating, seeing the fortress from the outside and in the distance doesn't do justice to what this place really is.

High, reinforced walls made of metal. Watchtowers with searchlights and mounted machine guns. Walls full of lookouts and huge orks armed to the teef.

Moreover, in the middle of it all, a big building made of jagged metal; I could get fifty different kinds of tetanus if I cut myself on any of the metal spikes.

We passed through a pair of metal doors that opened to the sides. I walked through the corridors of the fortress, past laboratories where Painboyz were experimenting, armories, workshops and garages full of Mekboyz, cars and tanks, mostly tanks, Death Skulls loved tanks.

We went down a long corridor and through another set of doors. We entered a dark throne room, with six metal pillars, three on either side, all decorated with the heads of Tyranids and other orks.

On the floor was a large blue rug that led towards a set of stairs, at the top of this stairs was a metallic throne painted in blue, on top of the throne were a series of metal stakes with skulls attached to them.

Moreover, sitting on the throne was the chief, Rukzod Nidkilla, a gigantic ork wearing metal armor and Nid parts, all painted blue. In his left arm was a Power Klaw and in his right hand was a Twin Link Shoota. On his waist was a Big Choppa in the shape of a large dagger.

In addition, from what I could see, he was wearing a large metallic backpack with what looked like a large metallic pipe just above his right shoulder.

"So dis iz 'da Gorlonik git?" Rukzod growled, resting his head in the palm of his hand.

One of the Nobs gave me a shove on the shoulder "'Da boss iz talk'n ta ya!"

"Yes, boss!" I answered nervously as I snapped out of my stupor.

"Hm… yer don't look like much ta me, but from wot dey told me, yer kilt a strange an' big nid by yourself. Iz 'dat true?" Rukzod asked with what looked like curiosity.

"No boss! I had help from a bunch uv boyz an' a nob." Please get this over with so I can get out of here.

"I imagined. I found it hard ta believe dat a random boy kilt dat nid all by himself. But 'dat iz not wot i want ta know, but wot happened ta ma konvoy!" Rukzod slammed the Power Klaw down on the throne, making me jump in fear, along with the rumble echoing through the throne room.

"Well, boss! 'Da nid kilt all 'da boyz on 'da konvoy. I found a trukk 'dat might have wot yer wanted, but 'da nid slammed into 'da trukk so hard it 'ploded. Whateva was 'n 'der turned ta ashes." 

Fortunately, I left the map piece at home.

Rukzod was silent for a few seconds before letting out a deafening scream, leaping off his throne and unleashing a hail of bullets towards the ceiling.

"AAAAHHH! ZOGIN GIT!"

Rukzod continued firing for a good few minutes until he finally calmed down. Taking a deep breath, but still shuddering with rage, Rukzod let out a whistle. Then a nervous Grot carrying a large cloth bag entered the room.

The Grot stopped beside Rukzod before the ork kicked the Grot away and grabbed the bag, opening it; Rukzod studied whatever was inside while muttering something.

"Here it iz! A hundred teef for find'n out wot happened ta ma konvoy!" Rukzod said as he threw the bag towards me.

I fumbled as I reached for the bag, nearly knocking it to the floor. When I managed grab it, the sound of thunderous footsteps approached me as the ground shook.

Looking up, my heart almost stopped due to Rukzod staring at me, his face just inches from mine.

"Yer betta not be lying, or..." Rukzod said as he poked me in the chest with the tip of his Power Klaw, pushing me back.

I swallowed hard as I nodded; I understood very well what he meant.

"Now get yer face outta ma face!" Rukzod screamed, his bad breath nearly making me throw up as spittle ran down my face.

When I finally got out of the fortress, I spent the entire day at home with all my Grots by my side. That night I slept with my eyes wide open.

-XXXXXX-

When I emerged from my shack with the crates full of teef, I came face to face with Dobby, Gulg and at least a hundred Grots.

"Guys, today we have a lot of work to do." I said with a big smile.

And we worked, a lot!

You know, if there's one thing Grots are good at, it's building things, and the advantage of hiring Grots over creating my own is that I rarely have to teach them how to do anything.

Now that I've hired a few hundred more Grots to my services, my job is even easier. I estimate I have two hundred and fifty Grots working for me in total.

During the time I was here in the city, I had my Grots do a series of small jobs, and one of those jobs was to find out which shacks in the ghettos were inhabited or not and surprisingly, the ghettos were mostly empty, which left us with a lot of free materials to use.

So my Grots ran up and down the streets of the ghettos, using hammers, saws, shovels and choppas to tear down the shacks and get materials, wood, metal and much more.

They brought this material to a large vacant lot where a large rectangular hole for the foundation of the building being dug, Grots pounded the earth and others prepared the cement, the materials we could not get, I simply bought.

I let Dobby and Gulg help the Grots. And headed towards my new vehicle, with another group following me. Luckily, Maground also sold vehicles, although the thing in front of me wasn't pretty.

A pile of rust known as a Junka Trukk, a big truck with a big rump and a Big Shoota mounted in the back, just above the driver's seat. The rump supported by a set of tank tracks and the front by a pair of large metal wheels.

Sending the Grots on the back, I climbed into the driver's seat and turned the key, starting the engine, then drove out of town, heading toward a familiar place.

-XXXXXX-

"Pull!" I yelled at the Grots as I pushed the pod with all my might.

"Pull!" The Grots screamed simultaneously from the top of the Trukk while pulling several ropes that wrapped the pod.

Come on! You trained all this time for nothing?!? I felt my muscles burn, my legs felt like they were going to break, but I kept trying. With a final push, the pod popped out of its hole in the floor and I kept pushing.

My feet sank into the dirt with each step and my arms felt like they were going to explode. I saw the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Floating in front of my eyes. With one more push, I managed to get the pod on the back of the truck with a metallic bang and knocking the Grots to the ground.

Without me having to order it, the Grots covered the pod with a black tarp and attached it to the hooks on the side of the Trukk, with that done, we entered the Trukk and returned to the city.

I stopped the truck next to the construction site and what followed was days of work. Over time, we made the foundation of the building, a mixture of stones and cement, erected the walls made of wood and reinforced with metal plates.

Then we prepared to raise the roof, I carried a wooden beam over my shoulder and placed it in a hole in the ground, the Grots used ropes and teamwork to carry their beams.

With the beams fixed, we started to put a roof on, put the rafters between the beams to support the roof and then built the roof itself a mixture of wood and metal.

The roof constructed in a rectangle smaller than the building, extending inwards. When the building was ready, it was time to paint it.

You see, the building stood out from the other Ork buildings, not just, because it was the biggest building in the ghetto, but because it was surprisingly regular. No wooden and metal spikes sticking out randomly all over the place. No unnecessary decoration like skulls and ork symbols. Completely straight walls and roofs.

Next to the main building, there were smaller buildings, one of them was the garage where the Trukk with the pod was, another was a slightly larger building with two floors where the Grots lived, and it was composed mostly of bunk beds and chests for the Grots to store their equipment.

In the end, it all looked like a big industrial warehouse painted green.

I approached the big building with a smile on my face, but of course I had to take some security measures, the glass windows were covered by metal bars to prevent anyone from entering, the walls had layers of metal inside and out, the roof and the edges of the roof were covered with stakes and metal spikes, all perfectly aligned.

In addition, the front door was a big thick metal double door with the Bad Moonz symbol on the front. I took the key out of my pocket and unlocked the door, grabbing the double handle, and walked into my new home.

Closing the door behind me, I held Laenae's crib in my arms and showed her our new home.

"So, Laenae, what do you think of our new home?" I asked the baby as I showed it around.

The baby's eyes widened with a curious gleam.

Moreover, I admit I had the same reaction when I saw the result of our hard work. We were in a large rectangular room with a floor made of wooden boards and walls of silver and slightly rusted metal, the interior lit by lanterns kept burning by squig oil.

There was some furniture scattered around, shelves, tables and chairs, a kitchen with a wood stove, made of stone. A bathroom with a big wooden bathtub, a workshop where I kept my guns and gear, and a room with a reinforced door where I kept my teefs.

Finally there was my bedroom, I said goodbye to my old straw bed and finally got a real bed, a single bed made of wood and metal to support my weight. With a mattress and pillow made of rags and cloth sewn together.

"What did you think?" I asked Laenae.

"Mah!" The baby squealed as she grinned and bounced into my hands.

"Great, glad you liked it; in the future we will prepare a room for you."

"Kha!" Laenae replied.

I chuckled a little at the adorable baby's antics. So the day passed, I helped my Grots with one more special job I had for them, just an idea to expand my business.

-XXXXXX-

"So what do you think?" I asked the ork beside me as I showed him the inside of what was once a ramshackle shack.

The place has been lightly renovated and squeaky clean, now having a real bed, a table, bookcase and chair.

The ork boy put his hand on his chin, analyzing the place, after some time, the ork nodded with a smile and handed me two teef.

"Thank you very much! A pleasure to do business with you! I'll be back for the rent next month."

As I walked away from the place, I glanced down the street where my Grots had renovated, painted, and redecorated the old ghetto shacks, making them more pleasing to the eye and livable.

This is my new business plan, renting cheap houses in large quantities to homeless orks roaming the streets. Two teef might not seem like a lot, but when you have a hundreds orks paying you every month, well, I guess it's easy to do the math.

I took a rolled up piece of paper out of my pocket, unrolling the paper, it turned out to be a poster with the Bad Moonz symbol, the writing was in Ork, but if I were to translate it into human language, it would look like this.

"Are you an ork boy without a roof over your head? A Git that just got off the ground and doesn't have a place to call its own? Rejoice, your problems are over, because I'm here to help you! I'm Gorlonik Teef Rippa and I'm here to offer you good quality homes for cheap rent! No! This is not a lie! I swear in the name of Gork and Mork! If you want to know more, come see me at the big green building on the edge of town or talk to one of my yellow shirt Grots! And remember, you can't fight if you're passing out from exhaustion, every ork needs a place to rest every now and then!"

More teef for my pockets! Hahaha! Well I guess that's enough for today, months of hard work has paid off, now it's time to rest. Taking a quick look up, I saw that it was beginning to get dark. Better, go early and get some sleep.

-XXXXXX-

"BOSS!"

"WHAT?!?" I jumped out of my bed, my Slugga ready to fire.

Dobby and Gulg burst into my room, covered in dirt and scratches. Gulg ran towards me while Dobby stayed behind, half of his body out of my room and shooting something in the hallway.

"What is happening?!?" I asked Gulg.

"Squigs!" Gulg screamed.

"Squigs?" I asked.

"SQUIGS!" Dobby yelled, taking cover behind my bedroom wall.

I had my answers to the question: when three creatures entered my room, the things looked like meatballs with legs, a big mouth full of huge teeth, and a long tongue dripping saliva.

Oh! Zog! Squigs! Laenae! Where is Laenae? I ran towards her crib, which was on top of a small wooden bed, but when I opened it, I almost fainted when I didn't find anyone inside.

"Laenae! Where are you?" I screamed as I lifted the crib and removed the bedding.

"Gagaga!"

I got my answer when Laenae crawled out from under the bed and crawled toward the squigs with a determined look.

Laenae and one of the squigs glared at each other before snarling and lunging toward the other.

"RROOAARR!" The squig roared as it charged towards Laenae with its mouth open.

"Wwwaagghh!" Laenae screamed as she crawled towards the squig.

However, that never happened, as I ran towards the squig and kicked it with all my strength sending it through the air at high speed and making it go through the wall towards the room adjacent to mine.

I quickly took Laenae in my arms, pulled some teefs out of my pocket, and threw them to Dobby and Gulg.

"Go hire some Snots and get them over here, quick!"

"Yes boss!" Both Grots responded before running away.

I barely had time to prepare myself before the other two squigs leapt towards me with their mouths open, ready to try to devour me. I knocked the first to the ground with a butt whack of my Slugga.

I put my arm in front of the other, blocking its bite, luckily my muscles kept the squig's teeth from sinking into my flesh, leaving only a shallow bite oozing a bit of blood.

I swung my arm hard, throwing the squig against the wall, then pointed my Slugga in his direction and fired a few shots.

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

However, the squig was faster, leaping out of the way and running towards me. As the squig approached, I felt a pain in my right leg, looking down I saw the other squig biting me.

I swung my leg, throwing the squig away, the squig landed and snarled at me with its teeth bared.

"Waaahhh!" In addition, Laenae responded with her own growl, trying to get out of my arms.

"Laenae wait!" I screamed as I held the baby tighter, I immediately took a step to the side, dodging the squig from before, and preventing it from biting Laenae.

I backed to the other side of my room, keeping the squigs in my field of vision. The two advanced towards me again. Know what? This has gone too far! I concentrated and focused on the memories of my past; I could see and feel the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Again.

Using telekinesis, I used one of the tables in my room to pin the squigs against the wall.

"Boss!"

Just in time for Dobby and Gulg to return with a group of Snots.

-XXXXXX-

We were outside my house; Dobby, Gulg, Laenae and I were watching the three squigs sitting on the ground in front of us as if they were dogs.

Meanwhile the Snots stroked the squigs' chins and heads, making them drool with their tongues out and let out happy barks.

One of the five Snots who now worked for me walked over.

"All ready, boss! They were trained as you asked. Or at least as much as you can train a squig." The Snot murmured.

"Will they at least listen to my orders?" I asked doubting a lot of what the Snot was saying.

"Well boss, if they were fed right and not mistreated then yes, they will listen." The Snot replied.

"Right. But what am I supposed to do now?"

"How about naming them, boss?" The Snot suggested.

A name? Well, if I'm going to have some squigs, I'm going to be using them in fights, so I it's better name all three. I approached the three squigs lined up in front of me. 

The squigs walked towards me and sniffed me for a few seconds before letting out yips and waving their little tails.

Unfortunately, Laenae didn't share the joy, the little eldar snarled at the squigs with an angry face as she tried to wriggle out of my arms.

"Laenae, no. You can't fight the squigs. You will scare them." I pretended to scold the baby.

Laenae's response was to snort with what I thought was arrogance and give me a small smug smile. Does she think I'm being serious?

"Listen, from today you three will be called respectively…"

"…Baskerville!"

The squig with light purple skin, huge teeth, spikes on its back and long tongue jumped at the name.

"…Gévaudan!"

The larger, paler and more muscular squig with the flat, bulging forehead but smaller teeth barked.

"... Finally you! You will be a beast of the battlefield; your roar will make your enemies tremble with fear while your steps will make the earth tremble, for all will learn to fear your name! And your name will be... Popcorn!"

The average squig. With green skin and huge fangs that extended upward, let out a ferocious snort through its nose and bared its teeth.

With all three squigs named, we headed to the back of my house where there was Snots working in a fungus field. These fungi came from the clearing where I fought the boar.

I wondered where these squigs came from and there was only one place I got agitated enough to release spores recently. It was just a matter of putting the fungi in buckets and boxes and bringing them here with the Trukk.

I approached one of the Snots "How's the fungus production going?"

"All right boss! The land here is good!" The Snot responded as he stopped plowing the land.

"Perfect! And do you know what fungi will become what in the future?"

"Yes boss! These ones will become Grots and Snots, Squigs and Orks." The Snot replied while pointing to the respective fungi.

The fungi that will become Grots or Snots were light green in color and were pointy and small in shape. The ones that will become squigs were bigger and perfectly round and the ones that will become orks were the biggest of all and looked like green mushrooms.

"Hm… Farm the ones that will become Grots, Snots and Squigs. Turn into medicine and food those who will become orks."

"Yes boss!" The Snot responded as he returned to work.

I don't want to have to deal with orks causing trouble out there. I'll just keep the Grots and Snots for now, something I can control.

With all of that taken care of, there was only one more thing I wanted to do, and that was a plan that was bound to go wrong.

-XXXXXX-

"Pull!" I yelled at the Grots behind me.

"Pull!" The Grots screamed in unison as they pulled the rope around my neck.

I was trying to get rid of the ork hunchback to make myself look bigger and stronger than I really was. It would make orks think twice about messing with me, but the hunchback proved tougher than I thought. Simply stretching didn't solve the problem, so I had to take drastic measures.

In other words, hugging one of the wooden beams in my house with all my might while the Grots wrapped ropes around my neck and tugged furiously.

"Pull!" I screamed again.

"Pull!" The Grots screamed.

"Wawa!" Laenae screamed at the Grots, the baby was inside her crib, being guarded by Dobby and Gulg.

"Pul..."

CRACK!

"AAAHHH!" I screamed as I felt sharp pain in my neck and back as I fell backwards with the Grots.

"Boss!" All the Grots screamed, running towards me.

Well, I'm not with Gork and Mork on the Big Green and I'm feeling my body below my neck, so I think it's all in place.

"Don't worry, I'm fine!" I assured the Grots as I got to my feet, but as I did, I noticed they were all looking at me in surprise, eyes wide and mouths hanging open.

"What?"

"Boss... You... You..." Dobby stammered.

"Say it!"

"You look amazing boss!" Gulg screamed.

A group of Grots approached carrying a full-length mirror, well, full length for a human. In addition, what I saw left me speechless; I was a ten-foot-tall mountain of muscle. Without that damn hunchback, I looked like a Nob, but I was still a Boy.

I started doing poses in front of the mirror, every little muscle moving and flexing with every little movement.

"So, Laenae, what do you think of me now?" I smiled at the baby.

Laenae smiled at me and clapped her hands.

"Guys, you all have the rest of the day off! Dobby, Gulg, Laenae, let's go for a ride!"

"Yes boss!" All the Grots responded.

I donned my full armor and grabbed all my weapons, Dobby and Gulg readied their Choppas and Sluggas while Gulg carried the ammo pack.

I strapped Laenae's crib to my chest and walked out of my house, where my three squigs were waiting outside, each in a doghouse with its name above the entrance.

We walked through the streets of Thumb of Gork, the orks in my path looked up as they widened their eyes and opened their mouths, but no words came out. They looked at me in surprise and got out of my way scared.

I continued on my way until I reached Maground's workshop.

"Hey! Maground! You are here!" I called Mek as I entered the workshop.

"What are you…" Maground had the same reaction as the other orks to seeing me, mouth open and eyes wide as he looked up into my face.

I approached Maground, the shadow of my body covering him completely.

"Do you sell War Buggys around here?"

The Mek nodded slowly as he pointed to a red Buggy at the back of the workshop.

"Perfect! Here are the teefs! Can you give me the key?"

Still without saying anything, Maground accepted the teef and handed me the key, I walked towards the Buggy, there was a Big Shoota mounted in the back, Dobby and Gulg climbed into the Shoota, my squigs climbed into the back seat and I sat in the driver's seat.

I turned the key in the ignition and heard the engine roar, with the WWWAAAGGGHHH! Running through my body, I stomped on the gas, pulling out through the garage at the back of the shop, looping around Thumb of Gork.

"Where do we go now, boss?" Dobby asked.

"Let's go to the desert, pay a visit to the Index of Gork, territory of the Evil Suns! I want a Speed Freak war bike!"

"Yes boss!"

"Gaga!" Laenae squealed, her crib open, and enjoying the speed we were going.

Wasting no time, I accelerated towards the deserts, time to explore a new part of this planet!

END OF CHAPTER