Chapter • 16

♱ •⋅ 1750 B.C. ⋅• ♱ •⋅ Calisto ⋅• ♱

Loren moved around inside the carriage, looking much more excited than usual.

"We really are out here!" he said with a huge smile and I couldn't help but laugh.

My sweet son was really surprised. It wasn't really something to be surprised about, after all... Loren had never left that place. He had never set foot outside the walls that protected the capital.

He was not even allowed to go out in the small village.

"Yes...we are" I spoke again extending one of my hands to support him. To make sure he didn't fall off the bench straight to the ground "but try to sit up, son...you might end up hurt."

Like a good child, he just ignored me and continued to kneel on the bench with both hands on the carriage glass.

I knew it was crazy and a part of me seriously wondered what sanity I had left.

Had I really done all that to make sure Asra was okay? Or was the truth that I was jealous?

I huffed.

It couldn't be that. It was Asmodeus, even if he was the prince of lust, even he had limits.

"Daddy! Daddy!" he shouted "there are flowers in front of the houses! In front of all the houses."

I nodded.

"Yes, honey. There are flowers in front of all the houses" I stated "that's how Aunt Lucifer likes her territory to be."

Loren's bicolored eyes sparkled with excitement and curiosity and at times like that I almost allowed myself to forget that that little being would die if it wasn't by my side.

I allowed myself to forget that Loren's days were numbered.

"Daddy!" he called to me again and pointed outside "when I'm grown up, will I have a territory too?"

That took me by surprise and although my mouth opened, not even a single sound came out. I couldn't say it.

I wasn't strong or cruel enough to say that... he wouldn't have a future. A territory or even reach adulthood.

I wouldn't say that to him, so I forced myself to smile.

"Do you want one? ' Was all I could mutter, and my son's innocent little eyes, twinkled."

"Yes! I want a territory as beautiful as Aunt Lucifer's!" He said seeming to take it all very seriously.

"I hope you really can have it" I wanted to say, but I knew that if those words came out of my mouth, I would end up crying.

I would end up wishing I hadn't taken Loren out of the castle. Not to have given him false hope.

But he was so like her...he was so sweet. How could they do this to him? Loren was just a child.

My hand stroked his hair and I pulled him close to sit beside me.

"Loren" I called him and when he stared at me waiting for me to continue, I smiled "you know daddy really loves you don't you?"

The boy with the bi-colored eyes and black hair - just like mine - smiled.

"I know, Daddy... I love you too" he replied with his usual sweet tone "and we will always be together, won't we?"

"Yes... always and forever" I mumbled the promise I had once made to his mother, but at least this time... I wanted to keep it.

"We're here" I heard one of the coachmen say and I smiled extending my hand to Loren "shall we? You need to rest and get ready for dinner."

He nodded, but soon his little face was taken by a small melancholy.

"Daddy..." he called to me "I... do I need to go to the doctor here too? I think I'm fine..." he tried to say and I knew he hated it, I knew it was painful and that my son didn't deserve what we did to him.

But I was selfish and that was the only way to help him stay alive. So I sighed and crouched down and stood in front of him.

"Honey" I held both his hands between mine "remember the deal we made?"

He nodded, but at that moment he wasn't looking into my eyes and probably didn't want to.

"But... it hurts..." he murmured in a tearful voice "it always hurts..."

My chest tightened and all I wanted most at that moment was to tell him that it would never hurt again. That he could play like a normal child or even run around. That he could ignore the doctor forever and nothing could hurt him.

But I couldn't, so I smiled, a forced smile. One I learned to fake to make my son calmer.

"Loren..." I whispered "I know it hurts, but... you need it."

He raised his little eyes to stare at me.

"For... for the cracks to lessen?" He questioned and all I could do was swallow dryly as I stroked his face with my thumb and nodded.

"But it still hurts..." he whispered "scars hurt too..."

"I know."

I took a deep breath.

"But I swear one day it won't hurt" I spoke quietly and I really wanted him to be telling the truth, I wanted this to be real.

Loren stared at me and I knew he stared at me until he was sure I was being truthful, he was like that. Just like her.

"Okay" he mumbled after a few minutes - but...Daddy....

"Hi..." I smiled.

"Can you... stay with me? Until... you're done?" his cold little hands squeezed mine and I couldn't help the weight that fell on my chest.

"Of course I can," I quickly replied, pulling him to me, to hug him.

To protect that small, delicate body underneath mine. I wanted to protect him, I wanted Loren to be safe at least once in his entire fragile and short life. But not even when I froze him after his birth did the angels cease their slaughter. Not even when my son was a fetus did they forgive his existence.

They took away the only being I have ever loved, they took away my peace, and they murdered part of my people. They invaded my kingdom and desecrated the home of so many of my vassals. So there was only one way to give back, to deal.

There was only one way to protect Loren and that way was to destroy the heavens and all who worshiped the God who ruined my entire life.

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