chapter 10: Nox

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was my body feeling like shit. My body hurt and I couldn't seem to stop shaking. The second thing I noticed was that I was not in the guest room. Instead, I was in the living room with a body draped over my own. They are warm and I feel secure here. Nothing can harm me when I'm in their arms. I press back against them and stiffen. The body was nude and was showing physical evidence of their slumber. I blush and gently shift away from their lower regions. The body pulls me tighter against their chest and presses their forehead to the back of my head. I relax a bit in their arms and sigh softly.

"Boys, I'm leaving," Kero calls and I jump out of the body's arms.

Ryan looks up at me sleepily, seemingly unhappy at the sudden awakening. He growls and pulls me back down and into his arms.

"See you later," he grumbles to Kero. I could see a faint smile on the doctor's face as he waves before he turns and stalks out the door.

"R-Ryan," I call softly.

"Shh, go back to sleep. You need your rest," he presses a gentle kiss to my bare shoulder and I shiver. He gently moves the furs over my shoulders and I sink into their softness. I close my eyes to do as the alpha says.

When I wake next, I am alone. I whimper and drag the furs tighter around myself, but they didn't hold the same heat. Ryan kneels in front of me and the smell of food hits my nose. I slowly sat up and shifted the furs so I could eat without sacrificing any of the warmth. Ryan gently touches my cheek.

"How do you feel?"

"Sleepy and in pain," I answered honestly, my voice hoarse. Ryan was clothed once more, much to my embarrassment. I shove a large bite of food into my mouth, trying to distract my mind from the memory of his size.

"Are you warm enough under there?" I shake my head. He hums and gently shuffles behind me. I shiver as the furs are moved from my skin. Moments later, however, Ryan was draping himself and the furs over my back. His legs bracket my own and his arms wrap around my waist, chin settled on my shoulder.

"Better?"

"Much, thank you. Have you eaten yet?"

"I had a bit before you woke," I nod and eat half of the food in silence.

"When will we continue our trip to the palace?"

"A few days. Kero wants to make sure you're okay after your heat and after the river incident," I nod and set the bowl aside to lean back against Ryan. A deep sadness settles over me at the thought of continuing to the palace. I assumed it meant that even after our talk the previous night, Ryan had still decided against keeping me. I sniffle and Ryan holds me tighter.

"Do you want to get some more sleep?" I shake my head. "What would you like to do then?"

"Does Kero have any yarn? I could knit him a thank you gift," Ryan hums and stands, taking the furs with him and exposing my body to the chill. I curl in on myself and shiver.

"Sorry," Ryan settles the furs. "I'll check for yarn and also get you some clothes," I nod and clutch the furs close to my body. Ryan returns a few moments later with yarn and some knitting needles as well as my clothes.

"Can I get some privacy?" I question, my cheeks turning into rubies. Ryan nods and walks off. I quickly dress, settle back into the furs and begin to knit. Ryan returns about thirty minutes later with a book. He once more settles himself under the furs behind me. He wraps himself around me and settles so we could focus on our tasks without bothering the other.

Tears spring to my eyes, the longing for this moment to be forever filling my chest. I didn't understand how an alpha could do this to an omega. Treat them like a mate and still want to give them away. I drop my needles and begin to cry openly. Ryan sets his book down and holds tighter. I press into his warmth and comfort as I lament over the fact that I was unwanted. This was exactly how I'd felt the night before. No wonder I'd wanted to end everything. It felt like a cave was opening where my heart should be and it hurt so much.

"I hate you," I sob out. Ryan tenses, but doesn't pull away.

"That's good," he says softly, though I could still hear the hurt in his voice. He holds me until my crying stops. I stare at his hands silently, thinking over everything before speaking.

"You really should learn proper etiquette when it comes to omegas. I can imagine you've led many on and broken many hearts. Unless I'm the only one. Gods, please say that's not true," I peer over my shoulder to look at Ryan. his lips were pressed together in a thin line and his eyebrows were pulled together. He takes a slow breath.

"I don't spend time around omega's. I'm sorry if I'm hurting you. I can leave until you're cleared to continue our journey," I choke on my own breath at the words. I press my hands to my eyes and try to control myself.

"Why are you doing this to me? Why do I deserve this pain?" I question, my voice thick with emotion.

"You don't deserve the pain. That's why I'm taking you back," I shake my head.

"I hope someday you understand the pain of this situation," I whisper as I push myself from his hold and move to the couch, the cold biting at my arms and face.

"I do," he says as he gets up and leaves the room.