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The Diary of Unsaid Feelings

Join Maia Green’s struggle, loving the man she thinks she could never have. A fair warning, this story hurts like hell so if you have a weak heart; for your own safety don’t read this, but if you’re a masochist then, you all are free to join Maia’s heartbreaking experience of loving her first love from a far.

strawberia · Adolescente
Classificações insuficientes
18 Chs

Entry 1: The Meeting

Diary of Unsaid Feelings

Property of: Maia Green

June 08, 2015

I'm terrible with introductions.

Many often mistaken me as a hostile type of person, but I'm not! There are times I get shy first, but if you truly get to know me, I'm a bubbly and friendly kind of person. Perhaps my looks are indeed telling them something. Anyway, I'm telling this because that will apparently be his first impression to me.

Today was our first day, and it was my first day meeting him as well, and let's just say we didn't precisely have a great encounter with each other. But to my defense, I was just completely shy to ask his name, so I acted tough in front of him because he was downright giving me scary looks. Making both of us gives the same first impression.

I instantly remembered how harsh I was. It was a simple, "What's your name?", question but the way how I said it—Oh my goodness! I'm now so embarrassed to face him tomorrow. We're even groupmates, for Pete's sake! What were you thinking, Maia?! Stupid Maia Green!

You know what, even if he looks cold and stern, I can't stop looking at his thick soft black hair, and oh boy! His gentle husky voice! Yeah, I might have a little crush on him, but! It does not change the fact that he's still scary, especially with the sharp look he gave to me earlier. It indeed sent a shiver down to my spine. Oh! Just to be clear, I asked for his name because our teacher assigned me to be our group's leader, which by the way my very first time being a leader and that's kind of scary and exciting too I guess? Anyway, He is my groupmate as well in our Science class so I asked for his name to write it on a piece of paper— respectively for that reason alone that I'll be needing to pass to Ms. Ana, our Science teacher. I'm not acting all defensive here, I'm just explaining!

Kidding aside, I literally thought that guy was a transferee since I know most of my classmates, considering I've been studying at The Ravenwood School for nine years now. Yeah, that's how faithful I am in this school. I'm in my Ninth Grade, so close to graduating from high school, yet I still do not know what course I would take in college. Going back to the topic, I asked my best friend, Paisley, who is my classmate as well if he knows that guy, and it turns out, he was an old student he even told me he's a pleasant gentleman. She would often borrow his jacket whenever she would forget to bring hers.

My fifteen-year-old heart melted, but I didn't let her see my reaction. I made her think I still think of him as a snob, cold-hearted guy. But, holy molly! I'm a sucker for those things! I honestly want to write his name here but I'm anxious someone might read this. When I'm ready, you'll know him. I guess I should start doing our presentation for tomorrow, curse reporting!

June 09, 2015

Alright, it's official! I have a crush on him!

So last night, while I was doing our reporting presentation, he messaged me asking if there's anything he could do to help me, which I unquestionably appreciate, because girl! I'm stressing a lot because most of our group mates were too busy to even offer help and some help by directly sending me some links, then that's it you are mostly seeing how stressed out I was last night, but then he came to the rescue!

We stayed up late just to finish this stupid PowerPoint presentation. From time to time, we would exchange messages talking about how ruthless Ms. Ana was for making us do a report on the second day of class. Believe it or not, my stress quickly went away and at that moment we became friends.

I don't know if it's his way to keep me calm or I'm just assuming, but I couldn't care less because whatever he did last night helped a lot. As a result, we carried out our PowerPoint presentation.

But that's not the only reason I formally announced having a crush on him. I was genuinely nervous about today's presentation. For starters, aside from the fact that we will present today, we're also the first presenter! Second, as I said before, it was my first time leading a group, so the pressure is on me, especially if my group mates didn't know what to do.

While waiting for Ms. Ana, I sat near my best friend, Paisley, to calm myself. I told her what happened last night. She looked ecstatic. I could still hear her excited squeal while saying, "Oh my gosh! I'm so happy for you! You look good together!" Of course, I rolled my eyes at her. "What the hell are you talking about?" I even scoffed. Instead of feeling better, that only made me nervous, so I went back to my seat and tried to calm myself.

The entire class was going wild, and I didn't take part in that and just bow my head on my armchair while relaxing my heartbeat. I think aside from the fact we'll be presenting today, Paisley's word got to my head. "Damn you, Paisley!" I whispered to myself.

Moments later, I felt someone tap my shoulder; I thought it was just Paisley who wanted to bother me; recalling that small tap he did, I realize how gentle was he, so I just ignored it but quickly I heard his voice. Even if the entire class was too noisy, with all the talking, singing, and other dumb high school things, I still heard his voice calling out my name. My heart jumped a little, making me raise my head. Our eyes met. Damn those brown eyes. I instantly look away, not wanting to get things awkward between us.

It turns out my group mates wanted to go through with our reporting once again, so I did. I explained the flow of discussion to them and while doing that I can't help but notice his soft stare at me and a small smile plastered on his beautiful face making me shy, and can't stop adjusting my eyeglasses which by the way look idiotic! Ugh, I hate that mannerism! But I think he could indeed relate to me since he's also wearing eyeglasses, but lucky him he has a pointed nose.

I think I'm sharing too much, but the second reason I have a crush on him was because of his comforting words!! Remembering his words now made the butterflies appear on my belly!

I was quite nervous, right? While we were waiting for our presentation to flash in front, I'm trying to calm myself by breathing thoroughly and rubbing my hands together to keep them warm. Swiftly, he went to my side and whispered, "You can do this. I'm with you, let's kick Ms. Ana's ass." Yeah, I am a little cruel, but I know what he meant. Believe it or not, his words of encouragement worked, and he was true to his words he would support me from time to time when Ms. Ana kept asking questions.

That time, in that state, being nervous and all his words naturally made me laugh and of course, comforted me, but now recalling those words he said! Gosh, dang it! I'm panicking right now. It felt like all the butterflies in my stomach burst out! "You can do this. I'm with you. I'M WITH YOU!" Those words kept repeating inside my head. How am I supposed to sleep now?! Curse you, DASH NEWITT!