Chapter thirty two

The stems have protuberances on their calloused bark; those that make it look like a giant braid that rises beyond the clouds.

So far the sky looks too light blue, rather pale like a sick person. Either that or it's just that she visualizes everything based on how she feels about herself. Ultimately her mind cannot change reality but she can change her own reality.

Only the boy who just committed suicide has been able to climb more than 5 meters up one of the stems.

Luz has always had a fascination with great heights. If she could climb, for sure, she would also jump without thinking about it.

Everyone around her is running around like crazy and bumping into each other. Hardly anyone has noticed the suicide that has just occurred.

The fact that she is not the only one who is indifferent makes her feel better and worse at the same time. But this confusion doesn't last because a cloud begins to descend and captures everyone's attention.

"I guess the only thing that unites us is a deep fear."

Above that cloud is the hologram of the coordinator's face. The same one who had warned them that there would be consequences for those who did not arrive on time for the championship. As always, Luz broke the rules; but now it is clear to her that she will never again play with punctuality.

"Good young men, our little number of latecomers (note his sarcasm). You should know that you have been sent here to discipline yourselves but for that you need to get to know each other a little better. Lucky for you you are going to be part of this game that has been designed to push your potentialities to the limit.

Why reward latecomers?

Because those who do not respect time do not respect their own dreams either. They know that the rate of depression and suicides has risen faster than their reds in the notebook or on their cheeks.

You are potential candidates to go against your own life.

Do you know that there is a plague that is plaguing teenagers worldwide?

You can be worthy representatives of our region to defend what makes us human.

The fact that we are isolated from the rest of the world does not make us unaffected by the current situation.

You will become aware of the whole global context when you come out of this game as you should be.

Today you can explore the game but tomorrow... you will know tomorrow.

Have a nice day".

The hologram disappears and leaves a trail of blue lights with a dull glow. There are a couple floating above Luz's head and she doesn't hesitate to touch them.

Everyone falls silent and looks at each other. The one who looks at Luz is the little girl who is a friend of Flavia's but her mother dislikes her worse than lactose.

The vivacity in her gaze reminds her so much of Alexis.

Has he participated in the creation of this virtual reality?

"Luz"

The girl is wearing jean shorts and a sleeveless blouse. As she approaches Luz shivers with cold because the wind doesn't slow down for anyone.

"Tara do you know what happened to my sister? When I saw her she had been shorn."

"How about if I borrow your little red sweater first?"

Luz has just realized that the boy with the mole had tied a thin red sweater around her neck. Noticing how much he must look like Little Red Riding Hood she immediately gives him the sweater. Although as soon as she takes the sweater off her neck, the cold makes her shiver a little.

Why is it that she always feels colder in her arms than in her legs?

"Of course, because the fat I have goes to my legs and my abdomen...concentrate".

I'd better not even give my opinion anymore because this little girl is looking for any excuse to be pessimistic. Guilt is not good for the souls of the little ratites in my belly. I'd better narrate as omniscient narrator and save myself from being a villain.

"I don't know the last time I talked to her she had a crush on Randy."

"Randy? Who's Randy?"

Luz almost got her whips crossed, literally; but every time you talk about boys she's already trained by her mom to give her brain the DANGER- SOS signals.

"Randy or better known as egg white."

A small mocking laugh escapes Flavia's friend. Just goes to show why media people have so much money. No gossip, no joyful life.

"He's bald."

"No, it's just that it would do him good to go bald."

"I'm not in the mood for gossip"

"I promised my aunt I'd get my cousin to give up that conflicted teen spirit just like me. Let him be as mature as Alexis..."

"Alexis?"

"We all know Alexis rots in money because he has a scheming mind that serves the scientists but no one says it out loud."

"How does the entire student body know?"

"That I can't tell you."

The little girl's voice goes from relaxed to tense to some extent.

"Why, why does everyone know but me?"

"In the midst of chaos we are all the same; but when the sun comes out the defects are what shine the brightest. Now there is no sun but when there was you have never been here."

Luz hates to be called that, she hates to be criticized by her relatives or herself. However, when an almost complete stranger does it, it makes her very angry. It hurts her because it is true that she is only here, in reality, when the teachers talk about the class or when there is some kind of distraction that entertains her and does not make her think about her sadness. She doesn't pay attention to the important things. If she did she would know that her sister is dating that "White Egg" guy.

"We're not talking about me."

"No, but if in your head there was someone else other than you and only you; Flavia wouldn't have noticed egg white who is more tremendous but she doesn't pay attention to me."

Luz can't deny that the best thing for her two brothers would have been for Veronica to be their older sister and not her.

"Tell me who Randy is"

"He's a poor devil, nobody pays attention to him; if he asked me to go out and I sent him to roll over a mudhole, literally. The point is that the only unwary one to fall into the clutches of Margot's half-brother is Flavia and all because she wants to be popular. Flavia wants to be Margot's friend and doesn't mind kissing her half-brother's toad."

It only crosses her mind how scared her mother will be when she finds out and worse her father. Luz has to clean up the mess before her parents find out about the problem. Unfortunately she is the older sister and has to help with something...damn conscience.

Luz didn't even know Margot had a half-brother. Surely when they were friends she didn't know about the existence of her half-brother either.

"She studies at our school?"

"No, I think he studies in the city. I don't know much about that one."

Before they knew it they had walked more than ten feet talking and Veronica laughing as if nothing was wrong. Instead of making Luz unconcerned, on the contrary, she is even more anxious and she is eager to eat one of those corn cakes that her mother and she eat hidden from the rest of the family.

"Are you really that calm or are you faking it, have you looked around?"

In addition to the big green stalks that remind her of Jack's magical beanstalk story; there are also doves that are made of leaves and red-skinned worms (that look like they're made from a dismantled rose) that act as riders. It's all a game; so let there be no doubt that there's a trick behind the prettiness.

"There's a trick I use when circumstances are too stressful. I've wanted to share my secret with your sister but she just ignores me, I hope and you do value my advice. You see, if there are situations that overwhelm us; but we have to cover basic needs there is nothing to worry about. It's not just about the basic outer needs; but also the inner needs that are very important in a survival game like this."

Listening to her Luz understands the reason why Flavia is friends with Veronica because she has a certain charm with her sarcastic lip. It is also noticeable that she gives good advice, if the mother knew her it is evident that she would approve of her friendship.

"You know what this survival game is all about?"

"First worry about your basic inner needs, for example..."

Veronica wants Luz to tell her but she's not sure what to say. Although she's had plenty of time to analyze herself, she's barely managed to figure out that her obsession with Alexis is because he rejects her and she's hopelessly capricious. Besides the fact that she doesn't think she has any surprises with him, Alexis can't be more unpleasant than she already is with Luz.

They walk through grass of a dark green like the color of bubbles, the ones painted with her black vomit. Which reminds her that she must have a digestive infection that she doesn't know how bad it is. Although that is an advantage according to her mother: "Luz, diseases do not exist, it is us, it is our body shouting to our conscience HEY, LAUGH AND MOVE, LIFE IS SHORT AND DOES NOT WAIT FOR THE PRESIDENT OF THE NATION".

She remembers that her mother's cousin's brother died of AIDS. They say his partner infected him but he was almost normal before he went to the doctor and was diagnosed with AIDS at too advanced a stage.

Veronica realizes that Luz is more lost than she thought and begins to believe that her more accurate nickname is "Deranged Girl".

Nevertheless, Veronica sees Luz as a guinea pig, so to speak.

Well, that's what Luz believes since it is well known that Veronica is the type of girl who craves popularity regardless of the fact that her empire is a barracks. As the saying goes, "In the kingdom of the blind the one-eyed man is king".

She is the psychology professor's favorite girl or so Flavia has told her. Her sister is very sure that Veronica has a future as a counselor and psychologist. According to Flavia, Veronica tries to lead the nerds in the classroom, but there are not as many brave ones as her.

Her sister had tried to talk to her so many times, but she was just in her own world. Guilt consumes her, making her feel such a heavy weight on her shoulders and so little expertise to cope with it.... And when did the guilt start?

Luz watches Veronica trying to catch one of the pigeons made of leaves. She looks like a little girl who is eager to discover the world her parents are protecting her from, a scene that makes her throat ache. Maybe it's the infection... OUT OF PESSIMISM.

She looks around and sees something almost impossible: Esteban and Nick are dancing side by side so cheerfully. The problem is that they hate each other's guts because Nick is the guy who stole her first love.

"This wouldn't even happen in my mind, but in her imaginary best friend's mind it would."

Reality becomes embellished and thoughts become like constellations illuminating a disaster.

Yes, she is the Deranged Girl.